Quoth Mitch Hedberg: “I played golf, I’m not good at golf, I never got good at it. I never got a hole in one, but I did hit a guy in one. And that’s way more satisfying.” Albert Pujols is good at baseball, but while he didn’t hit a home run against the San Diego Padres, he did hit Chris Young. And that might be satisfying if he didn’t result in him bleeding profusely between the eyes.
(If only the Base Wars video games series caught on, Albert Pujols could be on the cover. Perhaps with a more realistic-looking scimitar, even.)
Later in the inning Pujols rounded the bases and eventually slid through the plant foot of catcher Josh Bard. He, too, was injured and had to be helped off the field. Read more…
Curt Schilling spoke to the media today for the first time about his ailing shoulder. The bacon-laced one made it clear that he would prefer surgery on the joint from personal physician Dr. Craig Morgan, which would apparently have him back by the all-star break. But the Red Sox instead have prescribed a strengthening program with the thought of having him ready for Opening Day and the entire season.
Despite his pledge to invest himself mentally into the Red Sox plan, Schilling made it clear that the only reason he isn’t having surgery is because he has no choice - if he wants to keep his salary. Read more…
GUTTY LITTLE BRUINS sent this video over from the UW-UCLA game yesterday. It has Washington’s Tim Morris firing a rocket inbounds pass directly into the face of UCLA’s Alfred Aboya.
After the game Aboya, who suffered an orbital bone fracture, had the classiest comment we’ve seen in awhile: “They were doing everything they could to win. It’s allowed.” Read more…
The last few weeks we heard a lot about how the Red Sox weren’t looking to trade for Santana because their rotation was already so strong. Based on the crap the Mets gave up to get Santana, the Bosox now may be wishing they made a more serious run at the lefthander.
The Sacramento Kings, despite the crazy on-court urges of Ron Artest, were finally starting to find themselves. The club had won five of its last six games, with a renewed Mike Bibby and a slimmed-down Brad Miller as catalysts.
(Lovely cornrows, Bradley!)
But much like an Artest mood swing, suddenly Sacto is once again sullen, thanks to a Miller kitchen mishap.
Every time we hear something like this, we think of late-night informercials. Of which, one out of three features some sort of knife-sharpening apparatus. Don’t those people know that the future of a downtown Sacramento arena is in their hands?
The legend of oft-injured Super Bowl hero Plaxico Burress will certainly grow through the years, and the New York media is bound and determined to initiate the outbreak.
NEWSDAY has today’s “it’s a miracle he played!” story, reporting that during Super Bowl week, Burress “injured his left knee when he fell in a hotel shower Jan. 28.Read more…
The San Diego Union Tribune reports today that “LaDainian Tomlinson had an additional MRI on his left knee Tuesday that revealed his playing even just four snaps in the AFC Championship Game further damaged it.”
Surgery is still not required, but the knee will take longer to heal. To no one’s surprise, Tomlinson will not play in the Pro Bowl.
But the injury hasn’t stopped Tomlinson from traveling to Phoenix this week “as part of an endorsement deal.” Read more…
