Brooks uncovers all the fun he found during his visit to the Playboy Mansion.

• John Daly finds more than one way to enjoy a beer on the golf course.

• Astros GM Ed Wade is all choked up over Shawn Chacon’s suspension.

• Pete Carroll got into a little fender-bender with a cop car from the L.A. Sheriff’s Department - or did he?

• So much for Maria Sharapova celebrating another Wimbledon win.

• The Iraqi Olympic soccer team has been blown up - not literally, thankfully.

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It’s been hard out there for Houston Astros pitcher Shawn Chacon. It took 10 starts this year to become the pitcher of record, let alone a win, despite an OK ERA. But now he’s reeling of three straight losses, his ERA’s on the wrong side of 5.00, and the Astros have decided to demote him to the bullpen. What’re ya gonna do, Chacon?

(a) Accept new role as a reliever, do it well, hope for a speedy return to the rotation
(b) Hope to be traded
(c) Choke your general manager

If you picked (d), which is (b) and (c), not only did you find this post’s easter egg, but you are correct! (And suspended!) Read more…

Last night Hunter Pence hit a grand slam to lead the Houston Astros to a 4-2 win over the Chicago Cubs.

That’s probably an aberration, since he’s more accustomed to nightly popups thanks to his nudie model girlfriend “Terrie“. She’s been described as a bartender in some corners, but is undoubtedly best known for her propensity to pose for NSFW photos (you have to love it when a search on her turns up a site called “pinkmeatcompany.com”). Read more…

After a career that’s spanned 20 years, it’s hard for Craig Biggio to stay away from the diamond. So the ex-Astros great is coming back to baseball - as head coach for his son’s high school team.

(Craig leaps at the chance to become a high school head coach)

The HOUSTON CHRONICLE reports that Biggio is expected to be named head honcho for St. Thomas, a Houston-area private school where his oldest son Conor plays both baseball and football.

For Biggio, he won’t be stepping into an unfamiliar situation - and it’s not like he’s getting a bad team. Read more…

Miguel Tejada finally told the truth on a troubling matter that could have dire ramifications across the MLB landscape - he’s actually two years older.

The HOUSTON CHRONICLE reports that the Astros shortstop admitted on Thursday that he’s actually 33, not the 31 that’s listed in the team’s media guide. And his admission may have come about after an ESPN appearance.

(Video after the jump.)

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Albert Pujols had been pretty quiet this season, only going 2-for-14 & having his Opening Day home run washed out from the stat books. But the St. Louis slugger finally spoke up Wednesday night, hitting his first two official homers of the year in a 6-4 win over the Astros.

So, what finally go Pujols out of his slump? He may have been fired up from a pre-game confrontation with a Houston pitcher.

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The latest injury to befall Kaz Matsui is a real pain in the butt - literally.

(Kaz readies himself for a check-up)

The HOUSTON CHRONICLE reports that the Astros’ 2nd baseman will be out four to five days after being diagnosed with an “anal fissure”.

Wait, a what? Read more…

Roger Clemens seems to be avoiding every possibility of fading away quietly as the steroid clamor continues to hang over him. The ASSOCIATED PRESS reports that he’ll likely make an appearance at the Houston Astros’ minor league camp over the next few days, escorting his son Koby there, as he’s done for the past few years.

Clemens has attended in the past in order to play with his son, who will be trying to make the switch to catcher this season. But if the Rocket does show up, every question (if he takes any) would be about Brian McNamee and whether he would play again (which everyone presumes he wouldn’t). Read more…