Bronson Arroyo Loves His Drugs, You Bet He Does

When last we left Bronson Arroyo, he was telling the world on the eve of the trading deadline that he took androstenedione and amphetamines back in 2003, and that he wouldn’t be surprised to see his name pop up on baseball’s “secret” steroids list. The Reds, who were trying to trade him, were then shocked to learn there were no takers. So Arroyo remains on his yacht, strumming his guitar as a member of the Reds. Wait, they have yachts in Cincinnati?

Bronson Arroyo and friend

Anyway, our long-haired hero — who seems more like he should be a character in “John From Cincinnati” than a pitcher for Cincinnati — is amplifying his steroids remarks, even though no one is asking. Seems smart to me!

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Speed Read: All Bets Off On Rose Hall Of Fame Bid

If Vegas actually had a betting line on Pete Rose making it into the Baseball Hall of Fame, it would have probably been taken off the board for “suspicious activity” after the events of the last few days. The odds improved significantly when Henry Aaron - a close friend of Commissioner Bud Selig - mentioned to reporters that he’d like to see Rose in the Hall of Fame, leading to a report by the NEW YORK DAILY NEWS that Selig was “seriously considering” lifting Rose’s lifetime ban.

Bud Selig, Pete Rose

But if ESPN is correct, betting on seeing Rose anywhere in Cooperstown other than selling autographs at a card table might be a sucker bet. Their sources are saying that Selig is not considering reinstating Rose, leaving him to be happy with his place in the Soup Bowl Haircut Hall of Fame (alongside sartorial luminaries as Moe Howard, Chairman Mao and Jim Carrey from “Dumb and Dumber”).

Pete Rose in Vegas

Personally, I could care less one way or the other - at this point, the only way Rose actually makes it into the Hall of Fame is through the Veterans Committee, and they are chock full of grumpy old men who would keep people out of the Hall of Fame for not wearing suits and hats on their train rides during road trips, much less betting on baseball. The only person I feel sorry for is Ray Fosse, as he has to deal with a new round of awkward questions about Rose turning him into a tackling dummy and ruining his career.

All of which Rose finds pretty funny, I guess:

And speaking of “suspicious activity,” I guess you can go ahead and add The Big Security Threat to Shaquille O’Neal’s list of monikers. While appearing on “The Mike Wise Show” a few days ago to promote his stint tonight on WWE Raw, he asked the hosts if they thought he could get into the White House and meet President Barack Obama if he dropped in unannounced. DC SPORTS BOG has the answer, and it’s a resounding “No.”

Shaq actually tried it yesterday, as part of a bet (1,000 push-ups) with one of his handlers. While the guys at the front gate were “nice,” they weren’t going to let Shaq act like this is a Tonight Show episode from 1982, and he’s Bob Hope interrupting an interview between Johnny Carson and an 82-year-old shoe collector to do a walk-through on the way to his latest special. Between the economy, the Middle East and studying the White Sox roster to find Walt Weiss, President Obama might have better things to do.

As far as Raw is Shaq went: he hung out with a leprechaun:

…and then kissed a sweaty guy prone to bouts of irrational anger:

So yeah, I can’t imagine why they wouldn’t want him hanging around the Oval Office.

Finally, Jim Bunning might be a Hall of Fame pitcher, but it turns out that the Republican Party has no problem pulling him early and telling him to hit the showers. The WASHINGTON POST says that the Senator from Kentucky is bowing to pressure within his own party and will not run for re-election in 2010, a political fall from grace that would have been almost unthinkable a few years ago.

Jim Bunning

Of course, it turns out that openly discussing when a Supreme Court Justice with “the bad cancer” is going to die isn’t the savviest political move. And his “lousy” fundraising so far for the race - he only $376,000 in his war chest - isn’t helping matters either. Or the persistent rumors that he’s dealing with Alzheimer’s-related dementia - you know, the “bad dementia.” All of which adds up to his seat being widely considered as the most vulnerable in the 2010 elections, making him a problem the Republicans couldn’t ignore any longer.

So what happens to the 77-year-old Bunning? Perhaps a seat on the Veterans Committee - or at least a table at a card show next to Pete Rose.

Other sports news that happened while you were accidentally shooting three people with your brand-new Taser gun.

Which player eligible for the Baseball Hall of Fame for the first time in 2010 is most deserving?

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Michael Vick Allowed To Resume His NFL Career

T.O.’s Twitter-based lobbying must have worked, as Michael Vick has been reinstated into the NFL - if any team wants him.

Michael Vick dog

O.J. Simpson is having a swell time in prison - except that he thinks his cellmate is ready to kill him.

• While the real Canadian Open gets washed out, Canadian soldiers hold their own golf tournament in sunny Afghanistan.

Hank Aaron wants steroid “cheaters” out of the Hall of Fame, but wants Pete Rose in.

Michael Strahan’s new Fox sitcom looks terrific - terrifically bad.

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Aaron Putting Screws To Selig To Reinstate Rose

You know, we could just make Hank Aaron our baseball commissioner, eliminate the middle man and save ourselves a lot of unnecessary pain and suffering. For someone who’s been so reticent for the past few … well, his entire life, Aaron sure is surprising us this week with his high profile. A day after he came out squarely against steroid “cheaters” getting into the Hall of Fame, now he’s lobbying commissioner Bud Selig to reinstate Pete Rose.

Bud Selig, Pete Rose

And Aaron isn’t just speaking for himself. Two of his fellow members of the Hall of Fame Board of Directors, Joe (Silver Tongue) Morgan and Frank Robinson, have also come out in favor of lifting Rose’s lifetime ban. But neither, I would imagine, carry anywhere near Aaron’s weight with Selig. Read more…

Aaron Has Had It With You Kids And Your Drugs

No one is quite sure why Hank Aaron suddenly has turned from magnanimous, graying Ambassador of Tact to crusading, get-off-my lawn Gran Torino, but I for one welcome our new anti-PEDs overlord. Maybe this is just a function of old age, or perhaps there is just so much any man can take. Any man who used to be the all-time leader in career homers, that is.

Hank Aaron

Jeff Schultz of the ATLANTA-JOURNAL CONSTITUTION chatted with Aaron by phone on Sunday from Cooperstown, where the former Braves’ home run king was attending the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. And it was in that interview when the subject of home run records, Barry Bonds and steroids came to a boil, with Aaron getting very candid. Read more…

Joe Morgan Tries To Repair Another WTF Moment

When Joe Morgan tells this story four or five years from now, it’s going to be a lot more interesting than it is today. President Obama will likely be involved, and Joe will be the hero, possibly saving a busload of schoolchildren from a bear. So I would advise waiting until then for him to relate it. Otherwise it’s just a simple tale of him trying to correct one of his many on-air blunders.

Joe Morgan

You recall last week when Morgan was called out for his story on Sunday Night Baseball, involving himself, a no-hitter, pitcher Don Wilson and Hank Aaron. Which turned out to be completely false. Morgan addressed the situation on Sunday during the Angels vs. Dodgers telecast. And we are left as confused as ever. Read more…

Hank Aaron: Barry Bonds Can Keep His HR Crown

So much for Bud Selig’s idea about taking back the home run crown that Barry Bonds stole from Hank Aaron two years ago. As soon as the Commish started talking about the idea, Aaron, magnanimously, shot down the idea as a pretty silly idea.

hank aaron
(The Hammer always keeps it classy.)

For the second straight day, the ATLANTA JOURNAL-CONSTITUTION got the home run record scoop, with Aaron speaking openly about the mark with Terence Moore. More than anything else, what shines through is just how classy Aaron really is. Given yet another chance to defame Bonds, he took the high road, focusing on what a great player Bonds was, and how he would have been a great player whether he took steroids or not.

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Selig Could Reinstate Aaron As Home Run King

Ol’ Bud Selig just can’t keep up with the steroid scandals. Evidently they’ve been coming too thick & fast for him, since he’s only now dealing with the fallout from Barry Bonds’ ascension into the role of home run king. Selig claims that he fully intends to investigate stripping Bonds of the record and re-instating the previous king, his close personal friend Hank Aaron.

bud selig

The news today comes from the ATLANTA JOURNAL-CONSTITUTION, which is following up on a story that really got rolling when U.S.A. TODAY’s Christine Brennan made a case for Selig to throw Bonds’ marks out of the record books. To alter baseball’s official records, Selig would have to call on a commissioner’s power to “make decisions in the best interest of baseball,” which is exactly what commissioner Ford Frick used to put an asterisk next to Roger Maris’ single-season home run record.

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The Anti-Christ Is 12-Years Old & Lives In England

Here in the United States and around the globe, we hold our sporting records to be rather sacred.  Those who set the records tend to get mythologized over time and looked at as Gods to us.  For proof of this, just look at the crap Hank Aaron had to go through when he was on the verge of breaking Babe Ruth’s home run record, or at how horrified we were at the thought of Barry Bonds breaking Hank’s mark.

Right now in England there’s a 12-year old kid who I’m going to say has broken an unofficial record.  This kid has dedicated his entire 12 years of existence to achieving his dream, but now it looks like his road to glory is going to take a bit of a detour.

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George Foreman Promotes Grill In Letter To Judge On Behalf Of Michael Vick

ONLY THING REDUCED WAS FATTY CHEESEBURGER GRISTLE: A letter pleading for leniency written by Michael Vick to Federal Judge Henry Hudson is now online. Warrick Dunn, Hank Aaron and George Foreman also wrote letters on Vick’s behalf, and our favorite by far is Foreman’s (pdf):

George Foreman Grill

Nice to know the judge, after throwing Vick in the slam for nearly two years, now doesn’t have to worry about that pesky, fatty hamburger gristle. Hurrah! (via AOL Fanhouse)