Bündchen-Büttchin Wedding Is Marred By Gunfire

The second Tom Brady-Gisele Bündchen wedding went down in Costa Rica last night, and when you mix lawless Central America with the lawless NFL, something’s bound to go down. So it’s not a huge surprise that the power couple’s ceremony was interrupted by gunfire.

Yuri Cortez

No worries, straight men with a crush on Bündchen, and “straight” men with a mancrush on Brady; the happy couple is fine. The trouble occurred when the security detail came across paparazzi in the bushes, and fired on them as they attempted to escape. You know, the usual celebrity wedding stuff.

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Police Shoot Unarmed Son Of Ex-Baseballer Tolan

Most of us do not have the temperament to be a police officer. It takes an enormous amount of bravery to wear the badge and uniform and to be ready at all times for some sh*t to go down at a moment’s notice. As stressful jobs go, it’s somewhere between … actually, I can’t think of anything more stressful.

Robbie Tolan
(Robbie Tolan, demonstrating the difference between “unarmed” and “armless”)

But sometimes, when a rubber band is taut for too long, it snaps. Likewise, the stress of a situation can make an officer snap, and like with the rubber band, you do not want to be in the immediate area when it happens. Case in point: Robbie Tolan, a 23-year-old minor leaguer and son of longtime OF/1B Bobby Tolan. Robbie was with a cousin, coming back to his parents’ house after running to Jack In The Box late at night. But a policeman thought Robbie’s car was stolen (it wasn’t), and when the confusion of the situation set in, Robbie ended up with a bullet in his liver. (By that, of course, I mean he was shot by police; it’s not like they forced him to drink it or anything.)

Unsurprisingly, the incident has sparked outrage throughout the family and community. Read more…

Not A Repeat: Giants WR Involved In Gun Incident

Amid this entire “Plaxico Burress Shot Himself In The Leg Like That Cheddar Bob Guy From 8 Mile” controversy, there has been a rather salient question: Why, exactly, was Plaxico packing heat in the first place? And no, “Suicidal Leg Syndrome” is not a valid answer (though Pfizer is making a pill for it anyway).

Steve Smith Holdup
(You have to admit, that’s a really good drawing of a gun.)

Though we can’t know the real answer unless and until Plaxico tells us, a pretty good place to start would be Plaxico’s fellow receiver, Steve Smith; according to Tiki Barber at NBC (via NEWSDAY.COM), Smith was held up at gunpoint as he returned to his home in a gated community after a night out with friends Monday night. Okay, Tuesday at 4 a.m., but whatever.

“Ah, but if Smith lives in a gated community, how could he get robbed at his front door?”, you might ask. And there’s a simple and kind of disturbing answer waiting for you (proceeding emphasis ours):

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Armed Robbery On Back Nine of WI Golf Course

Usually when getting jacked for money for a round of golf, it’s about getting robbed by the club and caddy fees — not literally. A foursome playing at Brynwood Country Club in Milwaukee on Sunday got a shock on the 16th hole when they were approached by a gunman and forced to hand over money, according to the MILWAUKEE JOURNAL-SENTINEL.

Brynwood Country Club

The gunman stole from two of the golfers and a caddy before running back in the woods, but the incident didn’t completely derail the golfers.

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Bobby Knight Accused Of Taking Shots At People While Hunting

KNIGHT CAUGHT TAKING SHOTS AT PEOPLE - LITERALLY: SPORTS ILLUSTRATED reports that two people have come forward about taking shots from Bobby Knight last month. Not verbal shots, but gun pellet shots.

Bob Knight finger pistols

One woman said she was hit in the foot by birdshot fired by the Texas Tech coach while he was hunting. However, Knight came over to the woman and apologized, saying it was an accident - and she believed his claim.

But another man said Knight intentionally shot at him the next day, when he yelled at the coach for hunting too close to his house. Neither day’s shots caused any injuries, nor were any charges filed.

Bob Knight

Bobby calls the 2nd person’s allegations “ridiculous”, adding, “You haven’t heard anything from that guy for two weeks. That’s done. I got no comment on that whatsoever because that’s absolute (expletive).”

It’s not the first time Knight’s aim was off. In 1999, Knight was accused of shooting a friend in the shoulder and back with pellets while grouse hunting in Wisconsin. Claiming it was another accident, the then-Indiana coach was fined over $500 for hunting without a license.

Dick Cheney

Bobby must get his hunting tips from Dick Cheney.