• LARRY BROWN SPORTS uncovers the secret to Floyd Mayweather’s Saturday success over Ricky Hatton - Junior Danced to the ring with Stars Mark Cuban, Wayne Newton & Helio Castroneves:

• Speaking of the fight, Mr. Flip of the BALTIMORE SUN wasn’t thrilled with the Cockney crowd’s reaction to the Star-Spangled Banner. He suggests the next time a British boxer comes to Vegas, start the proceedings with this melody.• The BBC learns how modern the Beijing Olympics are, as seats are being scalped online.

• Oh, behave! AOL FANHOUSE thinks it’s groovy that given the choice, St. Louis Blues winger Brad Boyes would prefer to shag Elizabeth Hurley:

• Darren Rovell of CNBC wonders why Brett Favre isn’t being used so much to sell, sell, sell.• 100% INJURY RATE tosses out the red cards for this in-game soccer riot in Serbia.

• EVERY DAY SHOULD BE SATURDAY thanks God that Tim Tebow won the Heisman, ensuring the Florida QB with many years of mediocrity to come:

• MR. IRRELEVANT highlights a tribute video of their new favorite drink-slash-Redskins QB Tom Collins.• THE ANGRY T wants their money back, as they go through the best and worst sports ticket deals.

• The KALAMAZOO GAZETTE rolls out the red carpet for Derek Jeter, as the Yankees star will soon be in town for his induction into his high school’s hall of fame:

• YOU BEEN BLINDED pulls no punches that Mike Tyson wants Ricky Hatton to beat Floyd Mayweather Jr.• EVIL BEET GOSSIP hits the jackpot, as LeBron James tops the list of Forbes’ 20 Richest Stars Under 25.

• 100% INJURY RATE gets W-I-L-D with Steve Kerr and the rest of the ‘88 Arizona ‘Cats:

• Sad blog news - BIG TEN TAILGATE is being shut down by the conference suits from Chicago.• No close shave here: The WASHINGTON POST trims up news that the Wizards’ DeShawn Stevenson and the Cavs’ Drew Gooden are in the middle of a beard-growing contest.

• L’Chaim! JEN’S FREE THROWS tosses up some happy Hanukkah wishes from chosen NBA stars:

• FANBLOGS wants some bang for their buck, as Minnesota had the most expensive football wins - or win - this season.• WRIGLEYVILLE 23 discovers how Miguel Cabrera learned about his trade to Detroit: Ozzie Guillen’s wife told him.

ROBIN LEACHES ON TO SAC KINGS OWNER’S HOUSE PARTY: Just when you thought you were safe from champagne wishes and caviar dreams, Robin Leach is back with a vengance. And he’s schmoozing aloofly with the Maloofs:

Robin recently landed at the housewarming party of Gavin Maloof, co-owner of the Sacramento Kings and the Palms Casino. The celebration of Gavin’s new Vegas digs had everything - Playboy bunnies, rap stars, and an A-list of celebrity athletes, all with photos to prove it!There was Barry Bonds looking for the juice bar, and Floyd Mayweather Jr. hiding out from Barack Obama. Cowboy buds Terrell Owens and Tony Romo were trying to hook up on passes, and Ron Artest was being his usual polite self.

We also thought Steelers kicker Jeff Reed had made an appearance, but turns out it was only Larry Rudolph, the ex-manager of Britney Spears.And even the Kings Dance Team was there, shaking and shimmying their money makers while in splendid silver.

If you were there, feel free to drop a congratulatory note on their MySpace page.And what of the actual house? Let Mr. Leach tell us in his own personable way (just picture the nasally accent):

“It’s a mind-blowing, multi-million dollar palace perfect for a platinum playboy, and so luxurious and lavishly large you need a chauffeur-driven Segway scooter to go three floors from the upstairs bedroom’s balconies to the sub-level private movie-theater!

It comes complete with a swimming pool so long you could light a runway catwalk down it and still have room to stage a rock band at the other end!”

There, wasn’t that nice? Need some aspirin? Or a handgun to blow your brains out? Both are in the cabinet.

REPORT: REID WANTS DE LA HOYA TO RUN FOR NV OFFICE: RED STATE (consider the source) reports Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) is “working to recruit boxing legend Oscar de la Hoya to run against (U.S. Representative Jon) Porter in 2008.”

It probably won’t happen, considering De la Hoya is still looking to milk his boxing career for 1-2 more big money fights - like the fraud that was his square dance with Floyd Mayweather, Jr.

Not to mention ODLH’s documented legal issues, which include, according to R-S:

• “De la Hoya was sued by his former fiancé for palimony, a case in which the woman accused him of violating a restraining order. She and De la Hoya had a daughter prior to their split.”

• “He was also accused of raping a 15 year old girl in a Cabo San Lucas hotel room in 1996. De La Hoya denied the rape charge, but settled with the woman out-of-court.“

• The folks at FARK TV sense some technical foul play with their Tim Donaghy take in “Goodfoulers”:

• LARRY BROWN SPORTS checks their pocket watch so they know when to join Merrill Hoge at 11 O’Cock.

• 100% INJURY RATE looks for the earplugs, as Floyd Mayweather Jr. is ready to sucker-punch the public with a new album.

• THE WIZARD OF ODDS is feeling blue (and gold), as Alaska’s Barrow High School football team gets their own Smurf Turf:

• HALOS HEAVEN was almost too busy reading about the Yankees and Red Sox to notice the Angels’ Garret Anderson complain about East Coast bias.

• TV PREDICTIONS adjusts the contrast, as “World Series of Poker” host Norman Chad wonders why we need to see the 3 of clubs in high-def.

• POP JOCKS spots a heavenly figure, as the Mother Teresa card sells for almost $11,000:

• But don’t worry if you missed out, as EPIC CARNIVAL offers up a signed baseball by those paragons of virtue - Darryl Strawberry & Jason Giambi.

• THE ANGRY T gets off the (Tim) Couch to give us their NFL All-Bust Team.

• SIGNAL TO NOISE sees Kobe turning into Dickie V with his fawning praise of Coack K.:

• Gary West of the FORT WORTH STAR-TELEGRAM goes ape in seeing visions of sports celebrities at the local zoo.

• Nick Saban’s got a group of kids to make him proud, as NBC-13 in Birmimgham reports another Alabama player has been arrested - the 4th within the past 2 months.

FLOYD JR. FLAKES OUT OF OWN FREAKIN’ CHARITY EVENT: RAW VEGAS cooks up news that Floyd Mayweather Jr. didn’t show up to his own charity fundraiser:

The Sin City site had a reporter standing by on the red carpet for the Floyd Mayweather Jr. Foundation event. But he became red with rage himself when Floyd did a no-show.

Among those also not appearing as scheduled were rapper 50 Cent, baller Allen Iverson, actor Jamie Foxx and “singer” Don Johnson.

Now, you *know* the former “Miami Vice” star shouldn’t be busy enough to skip out of this gala celebration.

Well, at least *this* boxer isn’t afraid to make a grand entrance (and exit):

This guy should start a charitable organization of his own, in the hopes of finding a cure for getting in the ring properly.

• Woo-hoo! Eric Wilbur of BOSTON.COM d’ohes it in his Yawkey way as he Simpsonizes the Red Sox:

• Speaking of the folks at 742 Evergreen Terrace, THE FEED opens its casting call for the Simpsons Sports Movie.

• SHAKEDOWN SPORTS gets a warning from Mike Piazza - Don’t touch the hair:

• 100% INJURY RATE lets the beat drrrrrrrrop, as the T-Wolves’ Troy Hudson hears his rap career go ‘Thud‘.

• Have no fear, Atlanta Falcons - EPIC CARNIVAL has five easy pieces that’ll fit in the Michael Vick puzzle:

• DC SPORTS BOG finds some Phillies phans celebrating the only way they know how: with pelvic thrusting!

• ZONER SPORTS turns down the knob in choosing the sportscasters they’d like to see muted:

• SPORTS COLUMN is impressed with the double-dutch stylings of Floyd Mayweather Jr.

• EVERYDAY SHOULD BE SATURDAY has this Gamecock assesment from the Ol’ Ball Coach during Steve Spurrier’s turn at the SEC Media Days:

“I thought we had done something when we beat Clemson, but then Kentucky beat them in the bowl game.”

• RUMORS & RANTS congratulates the U.S. for winning the World Cup of American Football - although it took overtime to beat Japan.

CHAD JOHNSON WANTS TO DO IT ALL, AND HE SEEMS TO BE: After winning a race against a horse, Chad Johnson exclaimed he was ready to face some new challenges.

He wants to face LeBron James one-on-one. He wants to step in the ring against Floyd Mayweather Jr. He wants to grab the pole at Daytona.

And just like that, Ocho Cinco has taken steps to be Numero Uno in every field possible. So far, he’s been:

* Goaltending for University of Alaska-Fairbanks hockey.

* Coaching track & cross country in Connecticut.

* Getting hit in the face by fly balls for a rec team in Arroyo Grande, California.

* Operating a bead store in Tahlequah, Oklahoma.

* Ruling Beaver County, Utah, with an iron fist as county commissioner.

We’ve got a photo shoot coming later today (new pics will be up tonight), so here’s a roundup of what’s going on that will (hopefully) tide you over:

• GENDER REASSIGNMENT CREATES NEW LAT ASSIGNMENT: The LOS ANGELES TIMES notes on its website today, “Starting today, check out latimes.com/sports for Christine Daniels’ “Day in L.A.,” a daily column on the sports events, personalities and themes that matter most to Southern Californians.

“Responsive, thoughtful, experienced commentary from one of the area’s most talented and versatile journalists, updated throughout the day as events happen.”

Sounds like someone will be bookmarking SbB, DSpin, ASB, WL and TBL!’

Meanwhile, LA OBSERVED reports the L.A. Times recently introduced a huge inter-office promotional campaign (wot?) featuring gigantic photos of selected editorial staff in the elevators (wot?) of the Times building.

Notable omissions in the campaign: Daniels and J.A. Adande, who is apparently requesting a buyout.

• The wedding photographer who posted the Village People shot of Brady Quinn online responds to the ASSOCIATED PRESS, and tells A.J. Hawk to buzz off.

• BAYOU BUZZ reports Reggie Bush recently went to Spain to “film a commercial with global soccer star David Beckham.”

Bush: “That was a lot of fun. We bascially were teaching each other about our different footballs and what to do with them. It was great to get over to Spain and see the different cultures and see parts of the world that I never expected to see when I was younger.”

• Greg Oden last night after Dan Patrick jokingly (har har!) asked if he had “another job you can fall back on“: “I could probably break dance on the side of the street, make a couple of bucks here and there.”

• The TORONTO SUN reminds us that before the De La Hoya fight, Floyd Mayweather, Jr., said UFC “ain’t nothing but a fad.”

The Sun’s Jose Rodriguez notes UFC President Dana White “took offence and offered Mayweather a scrap against UFC lightweight champ Sean Sherk.” That forced the cowering Mayweather to “change his tune to say the comment was merely trying to build hype for his fight.”

Chuck Liddell’s response to Mayweather’s false bravado: “(The) fact mainstream boxing is talking about the UFC shows they’re worried.”

Liddell: “A few years ago, they wouldn’t have even mentioned us. Now they’re taking shots at us to try to sell more [PPVs]. That says a lot about how far we’ve come.”

• SPORTSBUSINESS JOURNAL’s Terry Lefton reports this week that Donovan McNabb participated in an ad shoot for Bruce Willis’ upcoming film
“Live Free or Die Hard.”

McNabb also had a “a role in last week’s lavish ESPN upfront presentation (and) McNabb and ESPN are getting chummy enough to contemplate a relationship that could include everything from using the QB as a sideline reporter on NBA games to being the host of the weekly highlights during ‘Monday Night Football’ telecasts.“

SOMEONE IS SKIPPING OUT ON HIS SENSITIVITY TRAINING: EASTSIDE BOXING has what it calls a “very candid conversation” about boxing with the uncle of Floyd Mayweather, Jr., Roger Mayweather.

Make that “a very, very, VERY, candid conversation” after eyeballing Roge’s expletive scorecard in the aftermath of what amounted to a steady stream of profanity (with an occasional stray adverb tossed in):

“F—“: 18 times.
“Motherf—–“: 4 times.
“Sh–“: 10 times.
“A–“: 10 times.

And now some pearls from the former professional fighter and current trainer of Floyd Mayweather, Jr. (his nephew):

On Oscar De La Hoya: “Oscar can’t do s— if you take his left hand away from him. You can take his left hand and shove it up his a– and he can’t do s— anyhow. He’s done if you take his left away from him. That’s it. People say ‘oh, Oscar’s one of the greats.’ No he ain’t.”

On Oscar De La Hoya’s trainer Freddie Roach: “Freddie Roach can’t train no f—ing way so it don’t make no f—ing difference anyway.”

On legendary Muhammad Ali trainer Angelo Dundee: “Angelo Dundee? What the f— did he do? All he ever did was say ‘your blowing it kid’ what the f— did he do? Angelo Dundee can’t be a great trainer no way.”

On legendary trainer Eddie Futch: “People say, ‘Oh Eddie Futch, he’s great’ and I say, ‘Yeah, look at him. The motherfucker had 24 motherfuckers that were already made so wakeup motherfucker.’ He didn’t make no fucking champions.“