49ers Sign Crabtree With Help Of ’80s Hip Hop Star

Sometime early this morning in a San Francisco hotel suite, with FOX SPORTS’ Jay Glazer lurking outside behind a large potted plant, the 49ers and receiver Michael Crabtree finally came to terms. First a “Seinfield” reunion, and now this? What miracle will God next bestow?

Michael Crabtree

First of all I’d like to thank the St. Louis Rams for making this all possible. Without your suckitude, the 49ers would not have scored a convincing 35-0 victory on Sunday, thus going to 3-1 and forcing Crabtree to realize that, as George Costanza would say, he has “no hand.” Also, what popular ’80s hip hop star inexplicably showed up at the negotiations with Crabtree? The answer of course is … Read more…