• Is there really any reason to watch the Fox College Sports broadcast of Kansas vs. Northern Colorado? Yes - and that reason is Samantha Steele.

• It’s bad enough Brett Favre can never decide when to end his career, but does he have to try to end other players’ careers with cheap blocks?

• Pacman Jones could be taking off for the Great White North. Winnipeg strip clubs already prepared to “Make it snow!” (It’s too cold for rain.)

• Why did Rich Rodriguez tear up during his recent press conference? Maybe because he’s being sued in a real estate deal gone wrong.

• Golf in England deserves a two-stroke penalty for banning beautiful caddy babes from the courses.

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Yes, round-number-list-posts are generally stupid, but we chose 5 because if we didn’t stop there, this would go to about 6,000. We’re nerds, and we’re going to let the nerd flag fly high for a bit.

If you’ve been watching ESPN over the last couple decades or so, you’ve probably noticed that whenever they’ve got an obscure stat up like “Angel Pagan is 4-22 against lefties with a 1-2 count and runners in scoring position,” it’s always courtesy of the Elias Sports Bureau. Apparently, they’re like black belt superninjas at Microsoft Excel or something.

(Looking good, Elias.)

Unfortunately - near as we can tell - they don’t provide the service free to fans, and there’s nowhere to submit questions on their website. So in lieu of getting these questions asked (and we’re pretty sure there’s nowhere to find the answers on Google), we’ll just pose them here, because, well, we’ve always wanted to know.

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