• Michelle Wie has her own blog where she can showcase some of her off-course talents - such as art work and wearing leopard & leather outfits.

• No one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills - mainly because they keep putting themselves in disastrous situations.

• A Nigerian soccer player tries to earn a roster spot by smuggling heroin.

• A furious female Canadian boxer decides to beat up some British soldiers because they were “being gay” on the dance floor.

• Successful sales of a 5,000-calorie burger fills minor league team’s coffers, clogs minor league fans’ arteries.

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Pardon me for being a soccer purist [If you were really a purist you’d call it “football,” you ass.-ed.], but I remember when it was all about the run of play, the penalty kick shootouts, Diego Maradona, Roy Keane! But not this, Dike, not this at all.

(I guess this is a heroin button. Who knew?)

Hmm? What’s that? No, I’m not using a derogatory term for lesbians; my favorite of those is “Subaru Jockey.” No, we’re referring to the Nigerian soccer player named simply “Dike,” which we would kinda suggest he changes at some point, because c’mon man. Dike was arrested for smuggling heroin into India, which he says he was doing in return for a spot on the Nigerian soccer team.

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