A gathering of like-minded enthusiasts coalescing from faraway lands and camping out to see gladiators duke it out on a vast battlefield where one wrong twist can send the warrior or his steed to their death: is that a NASCAR race or the Renaissance Faire? It depends; which one charges an insane amount for tickets?
(Admit it: this pileup would be even more awesome with horses)
One scholar has posited that NASCAR has become the latter-day jousting tournament, taking the place of the sport lost to time once hand-to-hand combat disappeared in favor of gunplay, a la Indiana Jones. Of course, this can logically lead to only one conclusion, disturbing as it may be: Digger is the modern incarnation of Merlin.
Let’s go racin’, forsooth?
Quiet night in sports as the NBA gears up for the All-Star weekend in Phoenix (first round of stories: “Hey, it gets cold in the desert!”). Therefore, coverage this morning will be 20-25% less sports-y. This is in honor of NFL Commisioner Roger Goodell taking a pay freeze this year and trimming his bonus from last year to drop his 2008 pay by roughly a quarter.
“The commissioner believes it will take a collective sacrifice of everyone to get through this difficult economic environment.” The commish is wise. However, the commish will certainly have a better case for the uncapped year coming up and the next CBA negotiations by showing “fiscal responsibility” now. Also, the layoff of 15% of league staff in NYC might be a little more palatable.
Darren McFadden, Bay Area savior and Al Davis’ last good idea, had his shoulder ’scoped last month, but no one knew his shoulder was injured. Not only that, but he went back to his college doctor to have the procedure done. We’re not suggesting this was a good idea, but Al Davis’ medical plan for the Raiders consists mostly of leeches and bromide. Hey, it’s worked for him…
(ARISE AND BE HEALED)
Here’s something to chew on since you can’t chew on your world record fingernails anymore…
- Bobby Abreu to the Angels for 1 yr, $5m. Apparently, deflation isn’t bad for every business in Anaheim.
- And the Brewers are saving money by only having to buy one color of skin paint for their bobbleheads in 2009. (Seriously? GM Doug Melvin gets a bobblehead?)
- The Denver Broncos fire the father-and-son team of Jim and Jeff Goodman as GM and other executive. Mind you, they just fired their GM last season and, of course, their coach this offseason. Who woke up Pat Bowlen and will this same person please check in on William Clay Ford?
- LenDale White has really been hitting the workout montage hard this offseason… four pounds lost so far.
- Fox is cutting back its Daytona 500 costs by trimming coverage… but they’re adding more costs by making Looney Tunes-esque cartoons around Digger the NASCAR rodent. You know, maybe they still love the Heckle and Jeckle cartoons in NASCAR and they’re public domain now…
- Our favorite Tweet of the day, from the Phoenix Suns: “All-Star round table topics - Obama, race, education, HIV - were just interrupted by a birthday cake for Bill Russell.” The All-Star weekend is magnificently bizarre.
- As a reminder to All-Star attendees, the DUI task force is out in full force this weekend. Sir Charles, J-Rich, etc… don’t make us write about you this weekend. We’ll do it.
- Finally, Gallup thinks America’s cynical and believes Alex Rodriguez took steroids longer than three years. Which leads us to our poll question…
Tags: Alex Rodriguez
, Al Davis
, Bill Russell
, Bobby Abreu
, Charles Barkley
, Darren Mcfadden
, Denver Broncos
, Doug Melvin
, Heckle And Jeckle
, Lendale White
, Milwaukee Brewers
, Pat Bowlen
, Roger Goodell
From the creator of the glowing hockey puck and Scooter, the animated baseball, comes the fresh hell that is Digger, the cartoon NASCAR gopher.
Apparently deserving of a NEW YORK TIMES profile, Digger is all the rage among the car-racing-kiddie set. Offering analysis, merchandising possibilities, and soon his own animated show, he’s just one more reason for those of us who are confused and resentful of NASCAR’s popularity to laugh. You say you haven’t been properly introduced to the little furry bastard?