That’s “GOVERNOR Blind Jogger Guy” To You, Sir

When I was growing up, my brother and I had the old familiar “would you rather be blind or deaf” conversation. He said “blind,” because he liked listening to music so much, and I said “deaf” because deaf people don’t need to be led around by dogs and their eyes don’t look like hell. I wondered if I should put my brother’s theory to the test by stabbing him in his eyes over and over, but singing while I did it so that he could, y’know, live the dream*.

David Paterson is so blind
(Looking good! Wait, that’s not what I meant, not THAT kind of looking. I’m so sorry.)

And speaking of blind people, that’s New York Governor David Paterson (the NY governor with the normal extra-marital affair, not the one who kept banging the prostitute). He’s legally blind, though Wikipedia tells us it’s due to an early childhood medical condition and not giving the wrong answer to the blind-deaf thing. He’s dressed like that on purpose, amazingly, and that purpose isn’t even Stevie Wonder’s “because he’s blind but still demands to dress himself because it makes him feel more important.”

You see, unlike most blind people, who are lazy, shiftless no-gooders (it’s okay, they can’t read this), Paterson has remained active in things you usually ought to have eyes for, like jogging. As a matter of fact, according to the NEW YORK POST, he even ran a marathon (or at least they’re telling him he did, anyway). Read more…

Thoughtful Advice For Beijing Olympic Volunteers

Beijing must have felt a distinct lull in bad Chinese translation jokes and chose to step forward and help the world in some kind of reverse humanitarian aid situation. (Ira Newble, you feel me? You do.) Therefore, we get a stock apology today from Beijing Olympics organizers for the way The Manual for Beijing Olympic Volunteers came out.

Chinese translations

This manual may have had kind intentions in the planning stages, but it came out the other side of the creation process as a patronizing pat on the head to blind, deaf, and physically different people. How so?

“The optically disabled are introverted. They have deep and implicit feelings and seldom show strong emotions.

The physically disabled… might have unusual personalities because of disfigurement and disability.”

Read more…