Everyone has it bad during the current economic downturn, but some may have it even worse than others. That includes professional athletes who made really made forays into the world of free enterprise. If you had Derrick Coleman on the list of former ballers turned failed entrepreneurs that popped into your head, pat yourself on the back; ol’ DC is going out of business, literally.

According to FANHOUSE’s expert sleuthing, the former would-be star turned uber-bust is having to liquidate everything he owns. Yes, everything, at a whopping 75 percent off. It’s like one of those “electronic liquidation events” you see advertised at “Enter Your City’s Convention Center Here” every weekend, except everything was once owned by one of the biggest NBA Draft flops in recorded history. Just think, you too can own the porcelain toilet from Derrick Coleman’s spare bedroom! And it’s 75 percent off! What a steal!

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SPREAD THE NOOS, PAYTON’S FAVORITE SHOOS ARE BACK!: The BOSTON HERALD reports that the old sneaker band Roos is making a comeback in the U.S. retail market. A Massachusetts-based company has “secured a license from U.K.-based Pentland Group to sell KangaRoos athletic shoes in the U.S. beginning this month, and the company plans to ‘expand into KangaRoos clothing and accessories.’”

Our one memory of the ’80s version of the shoe was the late, great Walter Payton’s association with the brand.

We think Sweetness was the only major endorser of the eclectic kicks (”check out our pockets!“), which certainly earns him a place in the pantheon of footwear endorsement greats, like Derrick Coleman (British Knights), Karl Malone (L.A. Gear), and O.J. Simpson (Dingo Boots):

Sadly, Roos shoes went extinct faster than the Bears’ playoff chances following the glory of Payton’s mid-’80s Bears teams. But here’s hoping the noo shoos will once again finally catch the nation’s fancy thanks to rapidly multiplying retail outlets.