The dream is always the same: Phil Mickelson and Darren Daulton are both rushing to appointments in another dimension/decade. Attempting to pass Daulton’s Astral Time Buggy, Mickelson hits his left front fender, causing them to both spin out and crash into a ditch. Cursing ensues (involving real curses), then an exchange of license information as curious dinosaurs look on from the treeline. I awake in a cold sweat.
If you though Daulton was out there, well, he is. But if this blog account can be believed, golfer Mickelson has his own, um, out-of-the-mainstream beliefs on the nature of linear time. Apparently Mickelson told fellow PGA professional Brandt Snedeker that he believes in time travel.
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Posted by
Adam J on Jul. 08, 2009, 2:30pm
Well, well. Here we are. Mr. Lenny Dykstra, the man who famously claims to be undefeated or something in stock investing, has filed for bankruptcy (Darren Daulton saw this coming, as with all other things). Bankrupt, man. Just imagine if Dykstra’s stock picks had turned out poorly.
(Lookin’ good, gettin’ shoulder squeezes. What could go wrong?)
Yes, it’s more than a bit mean-spirited to delight in the complete financial failure of a stranger, even a famous one, so let’s point out that the world would be a better place if he and everybody else were in better financial shape. We can all agree on that, right? Okay, good. That said, Dykstra’s bankruptcy signals the end of one of the most noxiously overconfident reigns in the hypersensationalized world of early-decade financial management. Thank God.
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Posted by
jason on Jun. 29, 2009, 8:30pm
• The Ultimate Warrior is nice enough to add his two ultimate cents on the dearly departed Michael Jackson.
• Christian Laettner is being sued by Shawne Merriman. CL better get a good lawyer and an even better bodyguard.
• A Texas Longhorns lineman learns the hard way why you shouldn’t text & drive by plowing into a co-ed’s apartment.
• An Aussie rugby coach is serious enough about drunken behavior on his team that he fines himself $10,000 for stumbling into the wrong hotel room.
• Larry Johnson shows he can treat the ladies right by buying some gals in Vegas a really big champagne bottle.
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Tags:
Australia,
Brad Fittler,
Chad Pennington,
Christian Laettner,
Daniela Hantuchova,
Darren Daulton,
Larry Johnson,
Mariano Rivera,
Michael Jackson,
New York Yankees,
Sergio Kindle,
Shawne Merriman,
Texas Longhorns,
Ultimate Warrior,
Wimbledon
Since the Day of Reckoning is going to be here pretty soon (Dec. 21, 2012 to be exact), Darren Daulton figures there’s a few loose ends he’d like to take care of. For instance, if you’re a professional athlete and you think you’ve done a lot of drugs, think again. Dutch would like you to know that he’s probably done more.
You’re most likely aware by now that the former Phillie is several very special varieties of crazy. My favorite is the time that he told Philadelphia Comcast that he talks to lizards:
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Posted by
jason on May. 30, 2008, 2:00am
• DEADSPIN is all excited to see Rick Reilly finally make his big debut for the Worldwide Leader.
• USA TODAY’s GAME ON is rooting for Lindsay Payne, as the swimmer is hoping to go from cancer survivor to Olympic participant.
• HUGGING HAROLD REYNOLDS is entranced by a spirited Darren Daulton, as the ex-Phillies pitcher talks about his belief in metaphysics.
• Now that the NBA will soon fine floppers, NE PATRIOTS DRAFT lists some NFL actions that should result in the poaching of player paychecks.
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