8:00 PM CSN Baltimore has video of Marcus Smith, a U.S. soldier who dressed as a minor league umpire to surprise his children at a Bowie Baysox game with a home visit from Afghanistan.
7:45 PM A Japanese Harley-Davidson motorcycle that was swept out to sea during last year's tsunami washed up on a shore in British Columbia last month. The bike's owner asked that the motorcycle be displayed at the Harley-Davidson Museum in Milwaukee as a memorial to the tsunami victims.
7:30 PM Buffalo Bills receiver David Clowneytweeted the results of his HIV test which came back negative. And to the critics of his decision to share his results, Clowney added: "Some people are Ridiculously stupid ... And can't see the bigger picture about things that are important in this world."
Tim Tebow probably never wanted to see the day when he’d be lumped in with such damaged goods as LeGarrette Blount, Michael Vick, and - ugh - Jeff Fisher. But here it is and here we are, Tebow: Tony Dungy has come rushing to your aid. Yes, the St. Jude of sports, the patron saint of lost causes and dog killers. Dungy. Accept it.
Dungy’s latest comments came to Dan Patrick this morning when talking about drafting a quarterback for a team with a Top 10 pick. Patrick threw out alternative choices like Sam Bradford, Jimmy Clausen, Colt McCoy, and Jake Locker. Nnnnnope. Because Tebow’s a winner, you see. Winners win games. Oh yeah.
We’re finally lifting the embargo on the Erin Andrews tape. We’re not posting it, we’re not posting links to it, we’re not posting screencaps of it, we’re not posting one shred of it. We haven’t even watched it, and if you’ve got any respect for women, neither will you. It’s creepy as hell and illegal, and we wanted to avoid all instances of cheap pageview farming by posting some boilerplate outrage.
But if what Harvey Levin, the executive producer of TMZ, told Dan Patrick a couple days ago is true, then this is a deeper issue than just one isolated incident of gross perversion. Apparently there are multiple tapes. And from multiple hotels.
So Richard Jefferson would like to dispel rumors that he left his prospective bride at the altar, calling off their July 11 wedding with only two hours’ notice. Oh, and he’s not gay. Seriously! The Spurs’ star appeared on Dan Patrick’s radio show on Wednesday to tell his side of the story, including how he broke it off with former New Jersey Nets dancer Kesha Ni’Cole Nichols via email. That’s one sensitive move right there. What, no Twitter?
And there was also a “six-figure” payoff to the jilted bride — another sweet, time-honored gesture. But Jefferson didn’t stop with Patrick. His radio blitz also included the Howard Stern show, because when you’ve just experienced the pain of breaking up with your fiance, the first person you should turn to is the wise and caring Howard Stern. Read more…
(Do you remember back in the day when you would hold your arms out and spin around and yell out “Tornado!” like you were a tornado? I’m not saying that’s what Harrison’s doing here, because he’s not a 5-year-old, but it might be a good tactic in run support. I guess you don’t need to yell out “Tornado” if you’re going to do it in the game, though, because that ruins the surprise and the offense can adjust. Anyway.*)
Oh, but do what ESPN won’t do and launch a fusillade of disgust at The Brett Favre Experience? You, sir, have our attention. What’s that, Mr. Harrison? The players think he’s selfish too? So, in a way, I’m more like Chris Samuels than Chris Berman? I… I don’t know what to say. I think I love you.
Woe upon anybody who turned on “NFL Live” on ESPN yesterday, as the Worldwide Leader had fantastic news for everybody: Tom Brady’s knee is doing great!
(Wheeeee yayyyy Tom Brady!)
This wasn’t particularly newsworthy, mind you; everyone knew Brady would be back for the start of the 2009 season. Then his surgeon and golf partner, Neal ElAttrache (that’s a fake name if I ever heard one; what’s Brady hiding???), gave his first post-surgery interview to the LOS ANGELES TIMES, and with quotes like these:
“With regard to his recovery of strength, I’ve never seen anything quite like it,” said ElAttrache, an orthopedic surgeon specializing in sports medicine at the Kerlan-Jobe Clinic in Los Angeles. “With an average person, it would have taken probably twice as long to get range of motion and strength back.”
Said ElAttrache: “Let’s face it, guys that are athletes like him, they’re strung together different. By and large, they follow the same biologic rules as the rest of us. However, they’re able to do things with their neuromuscular control and their strength gains and how they respond to exercise a little bit differently.
…it was only a matter of time before ESPN pounced and showed that amateur Peter King what a real ball-washing looks like.
Speaking of comebacks, it’s time to welcome back another target of unbridled man-crushery: Mirko “Cro Cop” Filipović, the fearsome MMA fighter. He set the world on fire a few years ago, mainly via YouTube videos of him kicking people in the head, before an uninspiring 1-2 stint in UFC sent him back to fighting in Japan. But rest assured, I didn’t forget the kicking in the head:
And yes, $50 is awfully steep for one person to watch an event, but if you’re watching a pay-per-view by yourself, there’s something very wrong with you. Pay-per-views are the flimsy excuse you need to have a social event, one that often involves healthy amounts of imbibition. It’s probably not very hard to find a sports bar showing the event, after all. But if “drunk guys in Affliction shirts” isn’t your thing, no worries; 1) Giants pitcher Brian Wilsondoesn’t care for it either, and 2) just invite a half-dozen friends or so over and do it like that instead. But yes, six fights in one night is most certainly choice. Figure out a way to make it worth your while and make it happen.
And finally in more news of welcome returns, Phil Mickelson has apparently set a date for returning to the PGA Tour: June 11, for the St. Jude’s Classic in Memphis. Of course, the timing has everything to do with the U.S. Open the following week at Bethpage Black, right in Phil the Thrill’s haunt in New York.
Mickelson first thought surgery for his 37-year-old wife could happen as early as a few weeks since the announcement, but that has been pushed back for another month.
Her treatment and recovery will dictate whether he plays in the British Open, or how much he plays at all the rest of the summer. Mickelson already has won twice this year and is No. 5 in the FedEx Cup standings.
It’s both easy and tempting to say things like “Amy Mickelson is good reminder that life is more important than sports,” but that’s like saying “an apple is tastier than an aircraft carrier.” Well, yeah, but the two things don’t share the same useful metric. Of course life is important; nobody ever disputed that. But we’d be stunned if Phil’s return was spurred by anything but Amy telling him to get back on the course.
Proving she’s not a three-program robot (1: drive car fast, 2: make non-threatening remarks, 3: wear bikini), Danica Patrick ruffled some feathers recently by telling Dan Patrick (not the same person; not even related, as a matter of fact) that taking PEDs isn’t cheating if you’re not caught. Was that wrong? Should she not have done that?
Cheer up, Nike: there’s still a way to salvage your precious Lebron/Kobe puppet campaign!
Would you like to read about a blog duping a plainly moronic radio host into thinking they were going to interview John Daly? You would? Would you like to hear said interview too? You would?? Then you, my friend, are in quite a bit of luck:
Why was Sidney Crosby hiding from the media before Game 3 of the Stanley Cup playoffs? Because there’s more than one player on the Pens you MSM idiots ‘Cause he’s yella, that’s why!
During his chat, the ex-Knicks coach & prez wanted fans in New York to know that he did everything he could to try and succeed in Madison Square Garden. And before you gothrowing more stones in his direction, Isiah would like to point out that he’s not the only one who couldn’t make it at MSG:
He’s failed with two different restaurant ventures, so I suppose it’s good that Jim McMahon’s newest foray into the business world has nothing to do with food. No, this time around, McMahon’s focus is on something much different: your wang.
McMahon, who hasn’t really been the MVP of anything since he was at BYU almost 30 years ago, is marketing a new “male enhancement” product called MVP. He’s on the sports talk circuit, and he spent some time on Dan Patrick’s radio show today talking about the revolutionary new scam product. I don’t know if this is what I envisioned his life would become when I dressed up as him for Halloween when I was 9.
David Stern appeared on Dan Patrick’s radio show this morning, and shared his thoughts on a wide range of crises and challenges the National Basketball Association faces for the future.
Whilst perusing Dan Patrick’s SPORTS ILLUSTRATED blog, I came across this: “Dan watched the BCS title game with Erin Andrews and her sister in a private suite last night. Not bad.” Whoawhoawhoawhoa … Back. The. F. Up. Erin Andrews has a sister? This obviously begs the question, is she hot?
Thanks to BUSTED COVERAGE for the scoop of the century. This could be the Pentagon Papers of the sports blogosphere. Now when someone says Andrews Sisters, I won’t be picturing this anymore.
