If you caught any of the Sunday night Patriots-Buccaneers game, two things were immediately apparent: Pats head coach Bill Belichick was in mid-season, full-on hobo mode, and New England is an unmitigated train wreck without quarterback Tom Brady on the field.

Brady has yet to take a snap in the preseason, and he didn’t even make the trip to Tampa because of what some source, on deep background, described as a “sore foot.” No idea if it’s the same foot Brady was hobbling around on prior to the Super Bowl, but it was enough to keep him back in New England while his teammates got embarrassed on national television.

After the game, Belichick was his usual, forthcoming self when talking about Brady. Read more…

Yesterday, the highly-litigated Cincinnati Bengals took time out from their practice to welcome a true American hero onto the field: Army Sgt. Michael Garvin.

Garvin has been on two tours of Iraq, the second cut short because of a pesky IED. He’s faced down live grenades, rocket launchers and camouflaged enemy combatants, but nothing shows his amazing testicular fortitude like having the guts to name one of your own sons after a Bengal.

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• LeBron James would leave the NBA & play in Europe, all for a yearly salary of only … 50 MILLION DOLLARS! (raises pinky to corner of mouth)

• Prince Fielder is sorry for brawling with Brewers teammate Manny Parra, but isn’t sorry for the kind of competitor he is.

• Tiger Woods, the world’s #1 golfer, is having problems going number 1.

• On the heels of Manny Ramirez joining the Dodgers, laundromats in the L.A. area have been inundated with lost red socks.

• Carson Palmer is confident the Bengals will win the AFC North.

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Despite the usual off-field & on-field problems, Carson Palmer believes in his Cincinnati Bengals. So much so, that he’s predicting his team will win the AFC North.

The PITTSBURGH TRIBUNE-REVIEW reports that the Bengals QB was asked who he thought would come out on top of their division. And Carson feels confident in his Cats: Read more…

• GOSSIP GIRLS trots out one of the next possible candidates who may go “Dancing With The Stars” - Kim Kardashian.

Good thing Reggie Bush is getting her in shape.

• Speaking of previous Dancing fools, Matt Mosley of ESPN’s HASHMARKS hikes up highlights from Jason Taylor’s first news conference as a Redskin.

• Steve Cofeld of YAHOO SPORTS catches Floyd Mayweather Jr. possibly parking his Mercedes in a handicapped spot.

• DEADSPIN uncovers some Virginia Tech players taking off their new unis to the delight of the females at a Hokies football clinic.

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• Carson Palmer admits that Ohio State Buckeye fans really drive him nuts.

• Not satisfied with cussing out Will Leitch, Buzz Bissinger gets into a scuffle with NCAA security over camera issues at the College World Series.

• Sooner State NBA fans, get ready to roll with the Oklahoma City Thunder!

• U.S. Olympians are trying to mask their concerns over Beijing’s pollution.

• An Iowa football recruit takes it all off for a flight on foot from police.

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It’s bad enough Cincinnati Bengals fans have to deal with their team’s label as a bunch of lawbreakers, and also endure the on-going craziness of Chad Johnson. Now they have to listen to their star QB diss their state’s college football powerhouse.

(”Carson loves hot dogs, but hates us! WAAAH!“)

Adam Jacobi of AOL FANHOUSE (by way of CAVSBLOG) overhears Carson Palmer bashing the Ohio State University Buckeyes. The former USC stud & Heisman Trophy winner was on L.A.’s KLAC radio on Thursday, and took the opportunity to sound off on the Scarlet & Gray: Read more…

This weekend’s American Century Championship celebrity golf tournament has brought together a crew of quarterbacks, both past and present.

When they weren’t out on the links endangering the lives of their fans, birds and all species in sight with their golf swings, the field generals were busy telling the GREEN BAY PRESS-GAZETTE how much it’s got to suck to be Aaron Rodgers right now. John Elway, Carson Palmer, Ben Roethlisberger and Chris Chandler all offer the starting quarterback to be, kind words and warm regards as if Rodgers just found out his dog died. Read more…

• Rick Morrissey of the CHICAGO TRIBUNE learns that you can insult Ozzie Guillen’s managerial decisions, but you better not e-mail him criticisms of his commercial rappin’ skillz.

• The NEW YORK DAILY NEWS has the sad story of Bronx high school basketball player dying after collapsing during a pickup game.

• The LA TIMES tells us we can snatch up Carson Palmer’s Laguna Beach home for just under $3 million. But if this view isn’t included, we’ll decline.

• ESPN’s Bill Williamson hikes up Brett Favre’s chances of playing with each of the 32 NFL teams. Wonder where he got that idea.

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Now the latest on everyone’s favorite dysfunctional NFL receiver, Terrell Owe…, no, sorry, Chad Johnson:

Frankly, we’re getting tired of Ocho Cinco’s oddball antics. So, here’s the Cliff Notes version of what’s been going on with the brooding Bengal:

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