Drunk Cardinal Chicks vs. Wheelchair Bound Usher

I’m not here to make some sort of claim that all St. Louis Cardinals fans are lunatic drunkards. Wait, yes I am. But the point of this post is these two particular drunkards below.

Matarazzi, McClure

(Stay classy, ladies)

Meet Bridget Matarazzi and Laura McClure, two fun-lovin’ 25-year-old gals who may have had a little too much booze and merriment on Saturday at Busch Stadium. How much booze? Matarazzi was arrested and accused of pushing an elderly usher out of his wheelchair. Just think: Sometime in the future, some kid is going to run across the photo above and say, “Mom?”

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St. Louis Gov’t To Milk All-Star Game For Cash

St. Louis, Missouri is a miserable place to be in the middle of summer, even in years when the Mississippi River’s not threatening to flood its banks. Temperatures rise regularly to the upper 90s, as do the humidity levels. Large swarms of flying insects (including mosquitoes) make even the shortest of outdoor walks miserable, if not painful. Even larger swarms of enormous red-clad hilljacks from southern Illinois and the inner wilds of Missouri eat their way through the city on the way to their annual Busch Stadium pilgrimages. Oh, and don’t get mugged.

Fat St. Louis Cardinals fans

(Is this what they mean by Show-Me State?)

If all that wasn’t unpleasant enough for visitors, at least most of us don’t have the St. Louis city government (motto: “60% Population Decrease Since 1950″) trying to take our hard-earned and ever-decreasing work bonuses away from us. Unfortunately, the same can’t be be said for the players selected to the 2009 MLB All-Star Game in St. Louis, who stand to lose a chunk of their All-Star bonus to The Man…even if they don’t play in the game.

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NBC Ices Stanley Cup Viewings @ Det, Pitt Arenas

• NBC puts a stop to Stanley Cup Finals viewings at the Joe Louis & Mellon Arenas - because it’s shaving nearly a point off of their local Nielsen ratings.

Red Wings Penguins

• Deadline? The Vikings never said anything about a Brett Favre deadline.

• Nice to see Ozzie Guillen back in ranting ‘n’ raving form.

• Don’t worry, Barry Bonds, at least your wife still supports you through these troubles times. Um, OK, maybe not.

• Oh boy! The MLB Draft is on TV tonight! It’s not like there’s anything else on worth watching.

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Goodbye, Old Busch Stadium, Hello, Softball Field!

As part of the joy and festivities surrounding the opening of the St. Louis Cardinals’ new stadium a few years ago, Bud Selig and MLB granted them the privilege of hosting the All-Star Game this season. Seems natural, seems fair. There’s one tiny problem, and that is that there’s absolutely nothing on the site of their old ballpark, Busch Memorial Stadium, right next door.

Softball Field St. Louis
(This year’s award for excellence in architecture goes to…)

So while it’s probably not feasible to get developers to start and finish construction of an entertainment complex for the fans in six weeks, as JOE SPORTS FAN points out, there’s one thing they do know how to do, and that’s building a softball field on the hallowed old grounds. All across America, overweight men with overexpensive bats just got goose bumps, and they don’t even know why.

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Proof St. Louis Is America’s Top Baseball Town

As a longtime resident of Kansas City, I can tell you that I never tire of hearing about how St. Louis is the best baseball town in America.

Typical St. Louis Cardinals

Some of you may question that assertion, but I’m happy to report that we now have video evidence that that claim has crossed over into irrefutable fact.

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Blogs: Wyoming Football Coach Flips Off Utah After 43-0 Onside Kick

• THE WIZARD OF ODDS fingers Wyoming coach Joe Glenn saluting Utah for their 43-0 onside kick:

Wyoming coach finger

• As a teenage girl sues the Cardinals over a scoreboard message, JOE SPORTS FAN takes a look at other words of wisdom flashed on the Busch Stadium big board.• SPORTS FROG feels queasy in throwing up the sad situation on the Dolphins sidelines.

• GOING FIVE HOLE won’t touch that dial, as NHL commish Gary Bettman will be co-hosting a satellite radio show:

Gary Bettman

• LARRY BROWN SPORTS thinks its time for Karl Dorrell to ride out of Westwood, but they wouldn’t be thrilled with gunslinger Mike Leach stepping in the UCLA coaching shoes.• RAWLINGS pitches out their 2007 Golden Glove winners.

Girl Sues St. Louis Cardinals For Rude Busch Stadium Scoreboard Message

ST. LOUIS FAN SUES TEAM FOR STD SCOREBOARD MESSAGE: A Cardinals fan was red with rage at a message seen on the scoreboard, and now she’s suing the team:

Busch Stadium Scoreboard

The ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH reports an Illinois teen filed a lawsuit against the baseball club on Wednesday, saying a cell phone text message on the Busch Stadium scoreboard caused her “shame and humiliation”.In May 2006, the girl was part of a high school trip to the Cardinals game. The stadium scoreboard had a feature that would display messages sent by fans via their cell phones.

STD poster

One of her classmates decided to have some fun at her expense, and sent a text to the Busch crowd that read, “(Victim’s name) has an STD! Eww!“She said almost all her friends were at the game, and the insult caused her to be “ostracized at school”, forcing her to seek “psychological counseling.”

Fat St. Louis Cardinals fans

You’d think being a Cardinals fan would be reason enough for counseling. But we kid the lovely & robust Redbird backers.