Jeter Jonesin’ For VT Cuties; Shushing Sharapova

Derek Jeter hopes to get a hold of a Virginia Tech valentine.

Derek Jeter Virginia Tech girl

• Surely Bud Selig was nervous about experiencing in-flight plane trouble? Of course he wasn’t - and don’t call me Shirley.

Tom Brady & Eli Manning meet again - to look for some sensible slacks.

• A group of Cuban soccer players in Florida hotfoot it to freedom.

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Video: Bryant McKinnie Gets His Freak On In Club

Vikings tackle Bryant McKinnie, he of sex boat scandal and street fighting fame, has cropped up in a somewhat NSFW video (unsuitable language, semi-suitable grinding, and definitely straight-up trifling hateration) from MEDIATAKEOUT.COM.

Bryant McKinnie and friends

The clip shows McKinnie getting his freak on with what appears to be a large contingent of groupies (this night vision is tough to make out). And in true lineman fashion, he easily dispatches the oncoming stuffy white guy trying to break up the play.

C’mon, buddy, you can at least try a swim move or something.

(Video after the jump)

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Rapper Says Bryant McKinnie’s A Pretty Good Guy

Despite beating up bouncers with metal poles, Bryant McKinnie is actually a good guy - if you were to believe Luther Campbell.

Luther Campbell Bryant McKinnie

The 2 Live Crew virtuoso & sometime radio show host appeared on Dan Le Batard’s WAXY-AM show on Tuesday. The Miami Hurricanes fan showed his support for the vicious Vikings partygoer, saying Bryant wasn’t to blame for blowing up. Read more…

Blog-Some: Spurs Only Score 5 In 1st Qtr., Yet Win

• SPORTS IN YOUR FACE is flummoxed as to how the Spurs can only score 5 points in the 1st quarter, yet still win Monday night.

San Antonio Spurs Atlanta Hawks

Answer: It’s easy when you’re playing against the Hawks.

• The TUCSON CITIZEN grounds out news that Ozzie Guillen would appreciate it if some of the bigger names in Arizona spring training would be bothered to take the 90 minute trip from Phoenix to Tucson.

• PRO FOOTBALL TALK notes that when it comes to Bryant McKinnie’s recent meltdown in Miami, Vikings coach Brad Childress doesn’t want to rock the boat.

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Report: Broncos Spied On San Diego’s Sessions

We’re *pissed* that Scott Van Pelt’s not starring in “Semi-Pro” instead of Will Ferrell - and we don’t have to apologize for saying so.

• The Broncos may have been Belichick-ing the Chargers, as a report revealed that Denver was spying on San Diego:

Chargers cheerleader binoculars

Manny Ramirez sox it to his agent, then gets on board with Boras.

• ‘Love Boat’ louse & ex-Hurricane Bryant McKinnie blows into Miami, causing a seastorm of spitting & obscenities outside a nightclub.

• Congress is pitching to put Roger Clemens under investigation for perjury.

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Minny’s McKinnie Might Have Problem W/Authority

One of the key figures in the Minnesota Vikings’ raucous high seas adventure two years ago, Bryant McKinnie, finds himself once again (allegedly) outside the law after his possible role in a street melee in Miami last weekend.

Bryant McKinnie and friends

(Bigger boob: Toccara’s or indoor sunglasses?)

The MIAMI HERALD reports the former Miami Hurricane is accused of starting some ish with a bouncer at a Miami nightclub after initially getting ejected from the premise. And when we say ish, we mean the whacking-you-over-the-head-with-a-metal-pole kinda. Read more…