New Jersey Nets Just Throwing Cash Into Furnace

Imagine if you took a $100 bill, then threw it into an incinerator. Don’t question why you’re doing it, just do it. Imagine doing that once every minute. Every minute, every hour, every day, every week, every month, for an entire year. With that committed devotion to wasting money over a prolonged amount of time, you could throw away over $52 million dollars… and you could also approximate the financial status of the New Jersey Nets.

Brooklyn Nets Jay-Z
(More like BROKE-LYN, amIrite?? Hello? Is this thing on?)

Now, to be fair to the franchise, they are not on pace to lose 52 million dollars this year alone. Everything is fine. In fact, they’re not on pace to lose 51 million dollars this year alone. Everything is fine. Are they on pace to lose 50 million this year alone? Um, on that, we have no comment.

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Jay-Z Has 99 Problems: Arena Financing Is One

Forget bailing out the banks - does the government want to bail out the New Jersey Nets? The NEWARK STAR-LEDGER reports that the team’s ambitious $950 million new arena in Brooklyn is in serious jeopardy, as Goldman Sachs appears to be unable to guarantee the funds needed to finance the $4 billion Atlantic Yards entertainment complex that will house the new arena.

Barclays Center rendering

I know it sounds like a lot of money to mere mortals, but can’t Nets part-owner Jay Z just pay the $950 million from his “walking around” money? I mean, the guy has the technology to make the plans for the freakin’ stadium magically appear out of his hands; why can’t he just make a billion dollars appear as well?

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