After some thieves split with 150 bowling balls, an alley in upstate New York doesn’t have any balls to spare. Do you like all these bowling puns? No? Too bad, there’s more.

The thieves chose Saturday night to strike, and somehow managed to get away with nearly a ton of bowling balls without setting off any alarms. It’s a daring swindle, but I suppose it beats life in the gutter.
I’m sorry, I’ll try to stop.
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It’s time for your Saturday afternoon bats**t insane break. And if you want bats**t insanity, there’s nowhere to go except Japan, land of Segway chimps.

Courtesy of UNCOACHED comes this gem. Basically, the hot girls spin around with a bat to get nice and dizzy, then go bowling. And for some reason they’re all wearing maid uniforms. And then for some reason they all put on bikinis and sing some children’s song in a hot tub. WTF, Japan, WTF. (Video after the jump, naturally).
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Pennsylvania is important or something for Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton for reasons known probably to those following politics. I’m not sure how the election process works, but if bowling is one of the tiebreakers, consider Obama framed. The Illinois junior senator bowled a 37 in Altoona, Pennsylvania.

(”Senator, this isn’t an election, this is bowling. There are rules. Mark it zero..”)
Now, everyone altogether in your best Dante from “Clerks” voice: “37!?” Poor Obama. At least he’s better at picking basketball teams than another senator. Read more…