Andrew Carter of the ORLANDO SENTINEL reports (with a straight face?) that “Florida State placed standout football player Preston Parker on athletic probation, suspended him for two games and will require him to adhere to six conditions after the junior wide receiver pleaded guilty to two misdemeanors Monday in Palm Beach County court.”

The charges? Parker had been accused of “misdemeanor possession of marijuana and with carrying a concealed weapon, a felony.” This news comes after he was caught shoplifting in 2006. Read more…