ROME BLOWS LOAD ON BROADCASTING AMOEBA WYNALDA: Jim Rome responds to TOM HOFFARTH about Eric Wynalda calling him “Kim“ and saying he has an affinity for gandering at guys in Speedos: “I will say this, the guy came on my show, apologized to me personally, in front of a few million people and then issued a similar apology which was read on ESPN – and obviously didn’t mean a word of it.
“I have better things to concern myself with than what Eric Wynalda is doing or saying.”
Rome’s “better things” include making millions per annum as a pioneer in his field. And I’ll wager my comp status at Circus Circus that this is the last time he’ll devote a brain cell to the anonymous, broadcasting amoeba Wynalda.
Wynalda’s the all-time U.S. soccer national team’s leading scorer. That and $4.50 will get you a Cinnabon at the Santa Monica Place Mall. He is sports history’s version of the grease spot you park over at Sonic Drive-Thru - and a symptom of all that ails U.S.A. soccer, which is a collection of under-sized, skill-impaired, over-arrogant peons.
LUKE FEEDING BRITNEY BOUNCE PASS FOURS YEARS LATE? BANG Showbiz is reporting that “Britney Spears is dating a 6-foot 8-inch basketball star. The 25-year-old singer has reportedly fallen for Los Angeles Lakers player Luke Walton and has been showing her support courtside.
“Britney screamed Luke’s name with the rest of his fans during the game against the Phoenix Suns on Sunday.”
Thanks to Walton’s superior basketball instincts (which will land him a big contract after this season), his supposed four-years-too-late back pass to the overweight, mentally ill former pop princess is a little hard to swallow.
That is, until you count the company his Dad keeps.
DIME BAG BILL SEEING DOUBLE: ESPN.com recently had the good sense to smoke out Bill Walton’s All-Star picks - and the former Blazer didn’t disappoint.
The bong watered-beanstalk rolled out his picks in predictable fashion, selecting Dallas Maverick forward Josh Howard for both squads.
I guess the buck-toothed redhead was so enamored by Howard’s performance last night against the Bulls (4-for-20 shooting, 9 points in loss to Chicago) that he couldn’t help himself.
WALTON’S WEED SCREED: The NBA cracks open its season tonight, and to get you geared up for the scintillating season, GorillaMask.net (some NSFW content) has a compendium of Bill Walton quotes.
Some of my favorites:
“Steve Nash is the most unathletic player in the league.”
“Greg Ostertag is one of the top centers on this planet!”
“Eric Piatkowski makes perhaps the greatest defensive play in Clipper history!”
and on the Grateful Dead: “They’ve been my life.”
Steve Harvey of the LOS ANGELES TIMES heard Bill Walton on KSPN-AM recount how nervous he was before his first network gig with Dick Enberg.
Walton: "(Enberg) patted me on the knee and said, ‘There’s nothing to worry about. When that red light comes on, there’ll only be 35 million people watching us.‘"
Bill Walton guested on Kilborn Wednesday night after Craig’s favorite team, the Timberwolves, lost by 30 to the Lakers. Walton: "I’m surprised to see you here tonight. I figured you’d gone and fallen on a sword somewhere."
Fun facts unearthed about USC football this week …
MOVIN’ ON UP: Reggie Bush’s parents patterned their life after the celebrated 70s sitcom, "The Jeffersons."
"Bill Walton’s Long Strange Trip" TV show has been airing Sundays throughout the NBA season on ESPN-TV. On a recent episode, Walton escorted former Clipper and current Cleveland Cadaver Darius Miles to the famed Haight Ashbury district of San Francisco.
During the visit, Walton tried to get Miles to sport some of Walton’s characteristic tie-dyed duds. The Big Redhead even dared Darius to don tie-dyed shoelaces in the Cavs next game.
Miles: "I’m sponsored by (Michael) Jordan. I think Jordan would fire me if I wore these."
Redhead: "Michael would be so proud if you wore those."
In a stroke of creative genius, the NBA is capitalizing on Kobe Bryant’s 81 points against the Toronto Raptors by selling a shirt incorporating his number with points scored.
Found on Deadspin, this actual quote from Bill Walton as he began to field questions for an online chat: “My lovely typer and I are sitting in the conference room in the building of ESPN.com and never have I felt more comfortable, never have I felt more relaxed. I walked in the room to find a gigantic gong and I feel more at home right now than ever.” Good to know there’s no dope-testing going on in Bristol.