Ozzie: Colon Likely Crying Over Michael Jackson

Bartolo Colon is still scheduled to pitch in a rehab assignment tonight for the White Sox Triple-A affiliate in Charlotte, but there’s a problem. No one’s still quite sure he’s going to show up. Colon was completely AWOL until late Tuesday, when the White Sox said that they finally got in touch with him. What’s going on with the big man, who’s supposed to be back on the big club by July 24 — if he gets his rehab work in. Manager Ozzie Guillen thinks he knows what the problem is.

Bartolo Colon Michael Jackson

In a report by the CHICAGO TRIBUNE today, Guillen said that he thinks Colon might be emotionally scarred by the death of Michael Jackson. Oh Ozzie, you old bull****er. Um, you are kidding, right? Ozzie …? Read more…

Bikini Car Wash Saves FIU Cheerleading Program

• FIU’s cheerleader squad is back in business - thanks to a bikini car wash!

FIU cheerleaders bikini car wash

• Welcome back to New York, Manny Ramirez! Now get out of here.

• Interesting that Keith Norfleet, ex-boyfriend of Sahel Kazemi, would write & perform a rap about shooting someone to death.

• Also interesting is the fact that Steve McNair’s mistress put all her furniture up for sale on the day of her DUI & suspected gun purchase.

• Despite the tragedy, it doesn’t seem like the ex-QB is Hall of Fame-bound.

Read more…

The White Sox Can’t Seem To Locate Their Colon

White Sox Nation and now baseball fans in general are all asking the musical question: Where in the world is Bartolo Colon? Colon, owner of a 2005 AL Cy Young Award and several XXXL jerseys, is kind of hard to miss; he’s listed at 5-foot-11, 250, which I suspect is hitting the target a bit low. The pitcher had been working on rehabbing his left knee in Arizona after starting the season 3-6 with a 4.23 ERA in 11 games for Chicago, and was supposed to start on Thursday in a rehab assignment in Triple-A Charlotte.

But no one has seen him. As you can see by their home page, the Knights aren’t exactly trumpeting his appearance. Perhaps Bartolo was confused by the fact that Knights Stadium is actually in Fort Mill, South Carolina, which is a suburb of Charlotte? Or perhaps a confused Colon is speeding toward Port Charlotte, Fla., thinking that he’s supposed to report to the Charlotte Stone Crabs. Read more…

Blog Jam: Dragon Out Yao Ming’s New Sneakers

• CLEVELAND.COM’s AND ONE gets a sneak peek at Yao Ming’s new Pump Omni Hexride sneakers:

Yao Ming Pump Omni Hexride shoe

No wonder his feet hurt - must be from embarrassment.

• LAIST reads up on Tito Ortiz & Oscar De La Hoya duking it out in Los Angeles today - in a battle of book signings.

• YAHOO’s GOLF EXPERTS BLOG wants folks who shout “Get in the hole!” to shut their own holes.

• Colby White of the DAILY TEXAN learns that some football folks have been bothered by the college bowl system as far back as 1948.

Read more…

We Only Wish We Were Truly This Clever (Sigh)

Bartolo Colon Smell Of A Winner