LSU COED SHAKES TAILGATE FOR TIGERS HUDDLED MASSES: Top-ranked LSU tees it up in Oxford Saturday against hapless Ole Miss.

While Oxford is one of the best tailgate locales you will find (the women there are vastly underrated, shh, don’t tell anybody!), it can’t top LSU tailgating, where the Saban-haters scare up local bachelor party performers to *entertain* the armadillo-eating masses:

Louisiana native Britney Spears would be proud of her peroxide-based, emaciated brethren, as they shake their tailgates before games for fun (and profit!):

Meanwhile, we plan to stay home on Saturday to watch Kansas attempt to throw its season away against upstart Iowa State. And watch porn star-breasted Ashley “Wonky Eyes” Russell as she slowly morphs into Burt Reynolds (her face is now tighter than a snare drum, with a lovely waxy sheen):

WE PREFER MUCH LESS COVERAGE IN RIVALS’ REPORTING: Yahoo Sports is the only giganto sports website we visit, thanks to a more understated, measured approach. The site columnists give us everything and more that the grandstanding, me-first cartoon characters at ESPN.com - without the involuntary audio, RAM-robbing pop-ups, takeover screens and Mike and Mike annoying Ad du jour (no Greenberg, my foot odor really isn’t that bad).

Though with the addition of Rivals.com content, we find the site to be a top-heavy in the college football department.

But we’ll take Ashley Russell over the unintentionally ironic boobs in Bristol any day.

UPDATE: THE BIG LEAD reports today that Yahoo Sports passed ESPN.com in visitors last month. And TBL has another link to Russell, who we think may soon become an internet sensation (without the arrogant, fake protestation and rapist-defending lawyer father).