New Olympic Sport: Hand-to-Hand Track Battles

Well aware that their sport lacked the necessary excitement to attract the casual fan, track and field officials across the globe have added a new aspect to their failing sport: hand-to-hand combat.

track battle

(A bruised and bloodied Alicia Follmar (Stanford) strikes her opponent.)

Though some purists may decry the brutality of these “track battles,” spectators could not be happier. Alabama native Jim Bob Johnson said, “I used ta ain’t care nuttin’ bout track, but ya get dem ladies hittin’ each other and I like it!” Read more…