Michaels: ‘Sooner Or Later 69 Will Be In Your Face’

It’s one of broadcasting’s great truths: Sooner or later, if you’re on the air long enough, you will have your Howard Cosell moment. Cosell, of course, had his a career’s worth of work nearly obliterated by one unfortunate phrase during a 1983 Monday Night Football game, when he blurted during an Alvin Garrett scamper, “Look at that little monkey run!” Fans of the Redskins’ wide receiver, who is black, were not amused.

Al Michaels

What Al Michaels’ faux paux during Sunday night’s game between the Vikings and Cardinals lacked in racial undertones it gained in hilarity, as at one point he noted of the Vikings’ Jared Allen (who wears No. 69): “Sooner or later, 69 will be in your face.” Indeed. Get that audio to Canton, pronto. And the porn hall of fame, is there is such a thing.

Audio following the jump. Read more…

Warning: Matt Millen About To Appear On Your TV

I didn’t watch that much of NBC’s pre-game coverage of the Super Bowl yesterday because frankly, the two weeks of build up to the game was enough for me. I didn’t need another five hours of hearing about how nobody expected the Cardinals to be there, or how Ben Roethlisberger was nervous during his first trip to the Super Bowl against the Seahawks a few years ago. That and I didn’t want to hear Tiki Barber say things like the Cardinals “are a team of density”.

Matt Millen warning

I’m sure a lot of people in Detroit felt the same way, because everywhere they looked there were reminders of how bad the Detroit Lions suck. First of all, they were at a Super Bowl, something the Lions may not even know exists. Then there was Jerome Bettis, who is from Detroit and won a Super Bowl in Detroit, but not for the Lions. Oh, and then there was Matt Millen on the screen every few minutes pretending to know anything about football, when any Lions fan could tell you he clearly doesn’t. Dealing with Millen’s mug on the screen was probably more than any Lions fan could take, so thankfully Detroit’s NBC affiliate made sure to run a warning on the screen whenever he showed up.

Seriously.

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Blog-O-Rama: Al Michaels To Join NFL Network?

• NEW YORK NEWSDAY’s Neil Best hears that the NFL Network gig vacated by Bryant Gumbel could be filled by - Al Michaels?!

Al Michaels Cleveland Nun

Stephanie Stradley of AOL FANHOUSE knows what the Vikings’ Kenechi Udeze is going through, as her sister had her own fight with leukemia.

• ON THE BASELINE follows up that Maria Sharapova is still mad about a forced photo shoot, so she plans to dig up some dirt on behind-the-scenes at the WTA.

• RANDBALL catches Nick Saban embracing new technology to get around NCAA rules created specifically for him.

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Danica Patrick Gets A Little Racy For SI Photo Op

Our off-the-cuff comments never need defending. (The 222s certainly help.)

• Racer Danica Patrick gets ever racier by posing topless for SI:

Danica Patrick photo SI

• While the mag convinced the delectable driver to show some skin, it won’t be covering Tiger Woods as Jesus.

John Rocker says he & A-Rod got steroid advice from the Texas Rangers.

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Latest Berman Video: Al Michaels Is A “F**khead”

What’s this? Yet another Chris Berman video? Joyfully, it’s true. YouTube member Ampex2000 unleashes the latest from Boomer’s behind-the-scenes braggadocio.

In this installment, Berman practices one of the hardest things he’s ever had to say to former co-worker Al Michaels - “Thanks, Al!” (language slightly NSFW):

Of course, the best is saved for last, as Berman bellows at the end:

See ya then, Al! Sure you can’t wait, ya f**khead.”

Dennis Miller Riffs On His Days In The Monday Night Football Booth

MILLER RIFFS ON HIS DAYS IN THE MONDAY NIGHT BOOTH: As Joe Theismann frets and fumes over his ESPN dismissal, another ex-Monday Nighter revisits his glory days:

3 Dennis Millers

In a Q&A with SPORTS ILLUSTRATED, former ‘MNF’ analyst Dennis Miller talks about his experiences in the booth. He says his favorite ploy was to try and get on-air reactions from Al Michaels.Miller’s fondest game-time memory was his comment while a player was getting his ankled wrapped. He told Michaels, “I haven’t seen that much fabric used since the environmental artist Christo wrapped Pont Neuf in Paris.”

Al Michaels Cleveland Nun

Al turned off his mike, then turned to Miller and said, “What the f— are you talking about?“(Coincidentally, that was the usual viewer response during Dennis’ two-year stay.)

Anyway, Miller also touches on the touchy subject of Joe’s jolt from the Monday Night mantle:

At first he used to drive me crazy, but I would tell myself, ‘Anyone who throws for 560 in a game at Notre Dame, you have to respect.’ But then I got to know him a little and I thought his on-air stuff got better.

Joe Theismann Joe Namath

“Obviously, it came down to a him or Tony (Kornheiser) thing and I don’t quite know what the machinations were, but believe me, I sniffed around. That story is on deep background.”

Sounds mysterious. Or maybe they just didn’t like him.