(Is that so?)

What ensued? A grand total of two stories, neither about anybody that casual ESPN fans have ever even heard of, before a strangely-worded, incorrectly-termed “denouement” that resolved little. Moreover, it had many in the blogosphere - which Deadspin and Daulerio purportedly represent - questioning what the hell the point of this could have been.

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Another Paige Green had a very public engagement pronouncement in the SEATTLE P-I two years ago, and now is married to a gentleman named Reagan Dunn.

And a third Paige Green is a B-Movie actress listed on IMDB.

We’re not the first to confuse the multiple Ms. Greens, but Friday we reported that the woman who was noted in the Seattle engagement announcement was the same person who is now engaged to John Elway. That isn’t the case, and all apologies to all parties.

Today’s water’s wet, sky’s blue story is brought to you by TMZ.com.

Warren Sapp’s an a$$hole: “Our spies at “DWTS” tell TMZ Sapp’s big head and man-diva attitude are causing problems. We’re told he talks down to everybody (especially the guy dancers and production assistants), yells at people and consistently walks out of rehearsals with partner Kym Johnson.”

Well at least he has his chronic halitosis to fall back on.

Remember those two goons from COI (that’s City of Industry to non-Angelenos) who are trying to lure the NFL to The Basin?

Not. Looking. Good. *shock* (more…)

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With a healthy Wells, even after Saturday’s SoCal shellacking, the rest of the Big 10 is probably no match for OSU. So long as UGA, UF and Okla. lose, you can almost guarantee the Bucks a return trip to the BCS’ big game (and another rout at the hands of the Trojans). I can already hear people firing up their CPAP machines in South Beach.

(Right before I called in the airstrike to escape the fourth quarter)

That whole scenario is far-fetched, you say? Then you haven’t been paying attention to the dark ages of a once-great sport. Yes, the pageantry and atmosphere of games like OSU-USC at the Coli is what defines college football, especially when you’re there to experience it first-hand.

But Saturday as I settled into my seat at the game (thanks to My Boy Barry), I couldn’t help being pissed about Tressel not allowing Beanie to play.

Safe to say, Wells could’ve beaned up and done more than the entire Buckeye backfield that day. But Tressel & Co. are gaming the BCS to perfection. They know that to risk further injury to Wells would be to eliminate the Bucks from BCS Championship Game contention.

(Those eyes smoked me out of the ESPN 710 VIP Tent)

Now, isn’t that what the great college game is all about? Sandbagging in front of a hundi-thousand in the most-anticipated college football clash in years?

DEADSPIN Editor A.J. Daulerio spent Saturday with me, and provided the day’s only excitement. On our walk to the stadium, A.J. accidently dropped his ticket. He didn’t discover this fact until he had until we’d walked five minutes down the road.

After backtracking about 1000 feet, we found the ticket, still somehow sitting on the sidewalk. (If only the fine citizens of Watts had been more considerate, and prevented us from attending the game.)

Now onward, to some of my fun pics from the Coli collection (Rick Reilly, Billy Bush, anonymous hotties!): (more…)

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(The Autumn wind is a butt pirate)

We’ll take you in and around the Coli with a genuine cutty sark-stained boots-on-the-ground perspective, and also have in-game observos from our seats at the game (Thanks Barry!). And I promise: absolutely, positively no mentions of those wacky(!) ESPN Gameday signs.

I’ll be joined by DEADSPIN’s A.J. Daulerio at the entire affair as well. And be sure and check out Matt Sussman’s account of the game over at Dspin. And yes, with tailgate fare in mind (*seasoned* bacon-wrapped hot dogs all around!), I plan to require Daulerio bring a generous supply o’ Depends to the proceedings.

(Timbo’s consolation prize)

The only thing I’ll add to all that’s been said about the game is that after Saturday, Mark Sanchez is your leading candidate for the Heisman Trophy. Sorry Timbo. And Mizzou, you might ask for your $50,000 back.

Prediction: USC 27, Ohio State 10.

Here’s how Elite XC and CBS is promoting the upcoming Kimbo Slice-Ken Shamrock bout:

A commercial featuring “Bodacious Boobs” and a bikini model showering - which of course is what first comes to mind when I think of CBS. At least after my last forced viewing of Big Bang Theory on an American Airlines flight bound for Topeka.

John Maffei of the NORTH COUNTY (CA) TIMES reports today from San Diego that former longtime SoCal talkshow host Lee “Hacksaw” Hamilton “is moving up to Sirius XM Radio starting Monday, when Sirius launches ‘Mad Dog Radio’ on both services.” Hamilton will man the evening shift at Sirius.

Moving up to evening sports talk show shift on Sirius? Table for one, Hacksaw?

No idea how I missed this, but here’s the cover image for the calendar the Redskins are selling on their official website featuring the team’s cheer squad.

(This image has not been photoshopped yes it has)

And to think I thought these (implied) NFL nudie calendars weren’t all about jerkoffs. (more…)

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Like lemmings, the SAN GABRIEL VALLEY (CA) TRIBUNE picked up comments by Semcken today, as part of an essentially baseless report:

Developer Ed Roski Jr.’s business partner says he has “no doubt” a National Football League team will play in Los Angeles in 2009, most likely at the Rose Bowl. Majestic Realty Vice President John Semcken also said he believes there is a possibility two NFL teams could wind up playing in the $800 million stadium Roski wants to build in Industry.

“We are going to have a team here next September,” Semcken said Tuesday afternoon.

There’s absolutely no credible evidence to suggest that an NFL team is poised to move to Los Angeles anytime soon. If there was, I’d know about it, or it would’ve leaked by now.

Not coincidentally, the MINNY STAR-TRIBUNE and ST. PAUL PIONEER-PRESS report tonight that new-stadium-less Vikings Owner Zygi Wilf was recently contacted by Roski about moving the team to Los Angeles - and had no interest. (Heritage clubs like the Vikes will never move - see Cleveland Browns.)

That’s not to say that a team moving here in the next couple years is outside the realm of possibility. But baseless bellowing by Roski and Semcken will do nothing to speed the process. I still bet that the fine gents over at AEG may have a role in bringing a team here before it’s all over. Their biggest problem? They won’t grab their ankles for the league and egomaniacal local yocal politicians.

Sports blogs like SbB have forever been accused by main media of going overboard with the T & A. Usually, when posting photos of the female form, we have a legit sports angle. (OK, not always.) But I find it rather ironic that many of those same (rapidly-fossilizing) finger pointers are now doing what we’ve long been accused of.

Take for instance the venerable DETROIT NEWS, and its “Sideline Satire” section. I’ll bet you didn’t know that an enormous collection of cropped-off pics of female Olympic athlete a$$es qualified as satire these days.

Apparently it does in Detroit.

Whoops! How’d that get through?

And just how serious is the editorial staff at the ST. PETERSBURG TIMES about servicing their readers in the middle of the night when the wife is asleep with football about to hit?

(Reminds me, where’s that sock I left the orange in?)

They’ve hired Jenn Sterger to do football picks. I’m assuming she’ll be steering clear of Jets games, seeing as all the inside team hotel rooms info she’ll be privy to.

Seriously fellas, if you’re going to try to post random, gratuitous girlie pics with a laughably flimsy sports connex, step aside and let a professional show you how it’s done:

TMZ has been cornering the sports celeb gossip market lately, this time with an exclusive on Tom Brady’s recent Brentwood real estate purchase. Brady, along with his girlfriend Gisele Bundchen, just dropped $11M on a residential lot in the city O.J. made (in)famous.

The two are planning a 20,000 square foot home together, which is apparently intended to allow Brady to be closer to the infant son he had with Bridget Moynihan (Moynihan’s reps denied the assertion).

Meanwhile, in another QB-related land grab, Tony Romo just spent a paltry $699K on his new DFW spread.

Let’s see, $20M+ to live with Gisele Bundchen or $699K to live with Jessica Simpson?

Earlier this week, Ticketmaster said it planned to attempt to expand its business (a “major push“) in China.

L.A.-based Barry Rudin, the largest ticket broker on the west coast and SbB sponsor, told me Wednesday, “I don’t think there is much to sell in China. There is however a lot of money there. I would have to see what events will sell well. I think certain concerts and sporting events could work. However, you are completely at the mercy of the government.”

Last sentence is something the IOC and the accompanying media came to realize the last couple weeks.

FYI: I’ll be at the UCLA-Tennessee game at the Rose Bowl on Barry’s dime this Monday night, with a live blog on SbB (and a SbB Girl in tow!).  Don’t be a stranger.

A.J. Daulerio of DEADSPIN tracks down an interoffice letter apparently from Roger Ebert of the CHICAGO SUN-TIMES to the dearly departed Jay Mariotti.

Ebert: “On your way out, don’t let the door bang you on the ass.”

(more…)

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One small detail though, the Elias Sports Bureau reports that over the past four years, Pennington has been much, MUCH more effective than Favre on passing attempts of 20 yards or more.

Tim Graham of ESPN.com yesterday highlighted the figures in his blog, which I heard about today on Dan Le Batard’s WAXY-AM show in Miami. As you might expect, those statz has South Florida a little more excited about Pennington, with equal parts bemusement.

Great find by A.J. Daulerio over at DEADSPIN:

(Someone might consider upping the wattage on those softboxes)

Sean “The Brand” Salisbury has been unearthed doing commentary for a new site called OpenSports.com. Salisbury will apparently be on the Mike Florio schedule (seven days per week). We’ll see how long that lasts.

Honest to god, the first thing I thought of when I saw the URL “OpenSports.com” was it was somehow related to the gay sports site OutSports.com. But alas, Tim Hardaway is apparently not among the new site’s early wave of hires (though he’s available).

It’s a little amusing to see Cris Collinsworth covering the Olympics, but he’s no less qualified than half the reporters on-site. NBC Universal employees right now must feel a little like the National Guard. You can be 50-years-old and hopelessly underqualified for the job, but that doesn’t mean you won’t soon be in a funny looking uniform, halfway ’round the world on 48 hours notice.

Sports TV execs are enjoying a brief respite from Jim Gray, as the mostly-unemployed broadcaster has called off the stalking for now, after landing the prestigious role of “boxing reporter,” on NBC’s Olympic coverage. I wonder if a monitoring anklet was part of the arrangement - and Dick Ebersol checking into his hotel as “Charles Bronson.”

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(‘Should’ve never told Tebow the interview was uncut and uncensored. Nuts!’)

Nice to see The Grip™ is back! And of course, The Grip™ takes on a whole different meaning depending on the context.

BTW, leave your own caption in the comment thread if you please.

From the I’m-Not-Making-This-Up-Dept.: SPORTS BUSINESS DAILY reports that Stats LLC today unveiled “a joint venture with Naveen Aranha, CEO of India-based Sportz Interactive, to create Stats Middle East.

“The operation will be headquartered in Dubai, and the move continues a marked global expansion for the sports data provider that last year opened a European operation and also has made significant inroads into India, China and Japan.”

STATS Middle East? That no doubt means President Bush is soon to be confirmed as the only man on the planet with a lower save percentage than Joe Borowski.

As you know, we’ve quite the homeless problem here on the westside of Los Angeles.

And then there’s the bums.

Oh man, DEADSPIN’s A.J. Daulerio today has a deconstructive dissertation that unloads on Rick Reilly - much like Rick Majerus after unscrambling Cinemax at the local La Quinta. (more…)

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• Michael David Smith of FANHOUSE has an interview with freshly-minted DEADSPIN Editor A.J. Daulerio. (that was fast!)

• Neil Best of NEW YORK NEWSDAY presents a classic clip of the late George Carlin talking baseball on “Kiner’s Korner“.

• SPORTS ILLUSTRATED’s CAMPUS CLICKS stays in step with O.J. Mayo’s new “Juice Monsta” footwear.

• YARDBARKER punches up some videos of the fun goings-on from Fight Night at the Playboy Mansion.

(more…)

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(The “Brand”: Canned by Bristol and now this?’)

Daulerio, an Editor of former Gawker gambling site “Oddjack,” had been a part time contributor to the site until a few months ago, when he was named a Senior Writer for the site. He’d previously been freelancing for Philly publications. (and some of our favorite, orphaned sweat sock-accompanied publications.)

Rick Chandler stays on as Associate Editor and Clay Travis of CBSSports.com has also been added as a fulltimer, with the same title as Chandler. (more…)

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David Wharton (Fight On!) penned the piece, which reports that sports bloggers are now being more responsible in their posting approach.

Truth is, we’ve been that way for as long as I can remember. We’ve a huge audience going back to 2003, and if we posted anything defamatory, we’d have had our a$$ sued off by now. Nothing’s changed here. Business as usual. (more…)

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