Today marks the 101st straight Opening Day at Wrigley Field in Chicago in which the Cubs won’t be raising a banner that says “World Champions” on it, and as we are all well aware, it’s because the Cubs are cursed. Seriously, they have to be. I mean, how else could you explain the fact that it’s raining outside in Chicago right now and that the odds are pretty good the game may be rained out? A high pressure system colliding with a low pressure system? Please! Keep your science to yourself, Nerdlinger. It’s the curse.
Okay, so I know that’s a bunch of crap. There’s no such thing as curses, but there are plenty of Cub fans around the world that do believe in them, and these people are idiots. They believe that the Cubs haven’t won a World Series because they wouldn’t let a goat into Wrigley Field many many moons ago. These same morons do things every year to try and reverse this non-existent curse, and early this morning those morons latest attempt included hanging a dead goat from the Harry Caray statue outside Wrigley Field.