Yes, the New York Yankees’ owners have taken over a billion dollars of taxpayer money (warning: PDF) in one form or another to fund their new personal playpen. Yes, the Yankees have taken their season ticket holders from old Yankee Stadium behind the woodshed and explained in so many words that they have purty mouths and how much it would please them if they could just squeal in a porcine fashion.
(How Yankees fans see themselves)
Still, they didn’t double (or worse) all the ticket prices while shrinking capacity to create demand. In fact, a small handful of tickets will go for $12 for each home game. Of course, that just allows people to watch most of the game on televisions embedded into the walls because they’re obstructed-view. But hey… game experience, baby!
How could they possibly lower the prices on those tickets? We suspect it’s because they’re so far away that they actually sit in international waters. Brooks heard a Montserrat vessel fired on a hot dog vendor during a dry run earlier today, but that’s not the least of your problems if you sit out there. We hear you don’t have to wait until interleague play to see pirates.
(How Yankees owners see Yankees fans)
(Hope you’re loving this Borscht belt humor, Yankees fans, because the remaining $12 seats are in the Catskills. The concession stand is lousy out there in Rochester… and such small portions! HA!)