St. Louis Gov’t To Milk All-Star Game For Cash

St. Louis, Missouri is a miserable place to be in the middle of summer, even in years when the Mississippi River’s not threatening to flood its banks. Temperatures rise regularly to the upper 90s, as do the humidity levels. Large swarms of flying insects (including mosquitoes) make even the shortest of outdoor walks miserable, if not painful. Even larger swarms of enormous red-clad hilljacks from southern Illinois and the inner wilds of Missouri eat their way through the city on the way to their annual Busch Stadium pilgrimages. Oh, and don’t get mugged.

Fat St. Louis Cardinals fans

(Is this what they mean by Show-Me State?)

If all that wasn’t unpleasant enough for visitors, at least most of us don’t have the St. Louis city government (motto: “60% Population Decrease Since 1950″) trying to take our hard-earned and ever-decreasing work bonuses away from us. Unfortunately, the same can’t be be said for the players selected to the 2009 MLB All-Star Game in St. Louis, who stand to lose a chunk of their All-Star bonus to The Man…even if they don’t play in the game.

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