F1 Team Accused Of Ordering Driver To Crash

We’ll admit that we haven’t exactly always been kind to NASCAR on this here interblog in the past. Sure, we’ve called it white trash and yes, we’ve mocked its fans. We’ve ridiculed the Stone Age cars and the endless driving in circles. We don’t care for the corporate faux-Americana BS surrounding it or the WWE-style trumped up “personalities” or “feuds.”

F1 crash

(Motoring: You are doing it incorrectly.)

We don’t deny we’ve said all those things in the past, but we’re also willing to give credit where credit is due. One has to admit that NASCAR’s “rubbin’s racin’” style can be - dare we say - exciting at times. And while teams and drivers are often caught using extra millimeters and centimeters to gain an illegal advantage, the subterfuge is part of the sport’s charm. At least they aren’t rigging potentially fatal crashes, using their drivers’ lives as pawns to squeeze a couple more bucks out of the prize purse - like Formula One.

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F1’s Ecclestone Now Blaming Jews For Everything

It’s unfortunate that most people in the United States don’t follow Formula 1 racing. Sure, it’s technologically advanced and the cars do more than go in circles, but that’s not what we’re talking about right now. No, we’re talking about the fascinating foot-in-mouth disease that has apparently taken over F1 boss Bernie Ecclestone’s brain.

Formula 1 Bernie Ecclestone

It was a few days ago now that we found out about his pro-Hitler and anti-democracy remarks in an interview. Then, just yesterday, the guy came out and claimed it was all a big ol’ misunderstanding and some of his best friends are Jews and all the other things that racist people say when they get called out for being racist. Water under the bridge, right? Well, not exactly - guess who Bernie then blamed for the world economic crisis? You guessed it: Frank Stallone the Jews!

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Formula 1 Chief Not Exactly Martin Luther King, Jr.

In the United States, the sports media freaks out every time an athlete or other sports figure says anything remotely controversial or interesting. ESPN blows up every salacious soundbite they can into a major media controversy, proof of which is the fact that Skip Bayless is still gainfully employed. As a result, interviews with sports celebrities tend to be the media equivalent of room-temperature tapioca pudding (bland, yet at the same time utterly revolting).

Whoopi Hamilton
(Artist’s rendition of Ecclestone’s dream driver)

Across the pond in Europe, things work a little differently. Our European cousins go mad for wacky sports like “soccer,” “cricket,” and “Formula 1,” and sports figures like Formula 1 owner Bernie Ecclestone talk freely about their desires for Black, Jewish women. Read more…