Listen up, gentlemen. If you weren’t aware of it already, this Saturday is Valentine’s Day. You know, the day that Hallmark invented to blackmail you into buying your girlfriend/wife/mistress/stalkee a gift, or risk not getting any for a few weeks? I just thought I’d warn you in case you’d completely forgotten about it so you still have time to go buy some crappy heart-shaped box of candy. Of course, if you’re single, Valentine’s Day could be a wonderful thing.
There aren’t many days during the year that make a single woman more depressed than Valentine’s Day. She looks around and realizes she has nobody, and begins to feel lonely, and as a result lowers her standards enough that even you, yes *you*, stand a shot at getting with her. Even someone as unattainable as Playboy’s Sexiest Sportscaster Erin Andrews is a legitimate target for you on Valentine’s Day, and lucky for you, she’s giving out pointers on how to get her.