Imagine how excited you’re going to be to see your favorite NFL team get started tomorrow. (or Monday. Or two nights ago. Whatever, humor me.) Then, think about putting on the jersey and heading out to the game a few hours early with a cooler full of meat and Natty Lights (admit it, that’s what you drink). Then, spending a few hours with old friends and new friends talking about how awesome it is that football season is finally here.

Then, finding out that the game has been canceled because of a traffic jam. Welcome to Scotland, where apparently the concept of an “alternate route” doesn’t exist. And of course it was a soccer game. I’m surprised you even had to ask. What other sport has such ridiculous excuses for calling off games?

This wasn’t some sort of low-tier amateur match or anything, either. It was a Scottish Premier League match between Hearts and Kilmarnock. And it had to be rescheduled for Tuesday night because of a traffic snarl caused by a flaming chemical spill. From HERALD SCOTLAND:

Kilmarnock have been forced to postpone their game against Hearts today after becoming stuck in a tailback on the M8.

The entire eastbound carriageway was closed following a chemical spill that caught fire.

The entire eastbound carriageway was closed after an incident involving a lorry fire near junction 5, Kirk of Shotts. Three units from Strathclyde Fire and Rescue service were dispatched to the scene soon after being alerted to the flames at about 10.30am.

Kilmarnock attempted to get a police escort to Edinburgh to play the game, to no avail. And after three hours in a standstill on the highway, they just gave up and went home. Let’s hope a brutal rush hour doesn’t keep them from making it on Tuesday. If you’re wondering, here’s how the Kilmarnock bus should have traveled to the game:

Motorists should leave the M8 at junction 6 (E), take the A73 (S) and the B7066, returning onto the M8 at Junction 5.

Duuuhhhhhh.

While I kid, this sort of thing isn’t unprecedented over here. Columbia University has had a number of basketball games called off over the years because of problems driving into Manhattan, including a 2004 game with Hofstra.