When we recently read that Scottie Pippen wanted to coach the Chicago Bulls, we were skeptical. Now we’re very dubious about his demand, considering his assessment of the team in the CHICAGO TRIBUNE today.

On Tyrus Thomas: “He dribbles better with his left hand than his right. He must have broken his arm when he was a kid. He shouldn’t be dribbling. He should be a fetcher. He’s athletic, but he doesn’t know how to play the game. He’s great from the neck down. What can he do? Have him do that.”

On Kirk Hinrich: “You can’t have midgets running your backcourt.”

On Andre Nocioni: “He’s turning into Rasheed Wallace with the kinds of things he does on floor. It makes the officials turn on the whole team.”

Should we go on? Safe to say that Pippen must have absolutely no actual interest in the coaching job, considering he justed torched any potential relationships he would’ve had with the players he’d be coaching.