A world-class golfer undergoes surgery to fix previously unreported damage that might explain recent failures. The rehab should take little time, allowing the golfer to return to previous form as soon as possible.

(Highlighted: Supposed Caesarean Area)

No, not Tiger Woods, silly: John Daly had surgery last weekend to repair a stomach muscle torn during a disastrous drive at the 2007 Honda Classic that also tore his rotator cuff, dislocated two ribs, and tore ligaments between those dislocated ribs. Mmmmm … Ribs. Wait, what?

Apparently, the other injuries masked the stomach muscle tear. Once those healed and Daly still professed pain that totally wasn’t heartburn so stop asking already, the doctors checked again and found the atrophied stomach muscle.

He’ll be back in competition in a couple weeks. Or will he?

Weighty issues aside, Daly caused all these injuries because he tried to stop his swing when he thought he heard a camera click. We understand golf requires a certain mental focus, but can we all get over the notion that golf requires an outdoor soundproof space? If the tiny clicks are too much, then pump ‘Cotton-Eyed Joe’ into the hole. Works for baseball. Barring that, don’t stop mid-swing.

That’s a lot of mass to bring to a halt, John. Instead, just let go of the club mid-swing. When a few spectators learn what the business end of a Big Bertha feels like, they’ll pack the cameras up quietly and stick to explaining how you are the man post-swing.