Reggie Wayne’s Metaphors Get More Confusing

Poor Clinton Portis — he had this schtick all ready to go for Week 3. Now he’ll have to scrap it, because Reggie Wayne showed up to Colts training camp on Sunday in construction worker’s gear, driving a dump truck. Wayne’s message? It’s time to get to work on construction of the road to the Super Bowl.

Reggie Wayne

Of course, knowing state highway construction workers like I do, it could also mean “We’ve spent three years building this overpass and we’re still not done.” Will the Colts also take two hour lunch breaks, the second hour of which they’ll be charging double overtime? The answer is unclear.

Of course we recall in 2007, when Wayne arrived in camp in camouflage gear — you know, since the team had won the Super Bowl, they were now the hunted. That didn’t make much sense, though. If the Colts were the hunted, shouldn’t Wayne have been wearing a deer outfit?

Anyway, Wayne was committed to Sunday’s new metaphor, arriving with a custom hard hat, goggles, and a lunch box (which was quickly stolen by Corey Hilliard).

“This here is all about the road to the Super Bowl; construction. We’ve just got to reclaim the blueprint to get this done.”

When asked where Peyton Manning fit into all of this, Wayne said:

“He’s the janitor. We need all of our bathrooms A-1. That’s his main job.”

If Wayne had been better versed on his 1970s disco/dance groups, however, he might have gone in a different direction.

The Village People