The United States Postal Service has very stringent rules about who may be commemorated on a postage stamp. The person must be deceased for five years (except U.S. Presidents). They must wind their way through the Citizens’ Stamp Advisory Committee, fifteen Americans serious about the gravity of their task. (You can tell because Karl Malden’s on the committee.)

On the other hand, the commemorative envelope program apparently has all the oversight of a “Take a Penny, Leave a Penny” tin because Randy Moss’ smiling face will be plastered across limited edition commemorative envelopes in West Virginia this week.

Moss was not able to send his signed contract with one of the 5,000 printed envelopes, unfortunately; these envelopes already have their (Patriots helmet) first class stamps canceled. It might have helped negotiations if he had used the envelope to send his demands in, though; it has his 2007 and career statistics on them, skipping the Oakland years quite tidily.

A spokesman for the regional USPS office points out the level of honor bestowed upon Moss: “This does not happen often. He’s joining some great company with (West Virginia athletes) Mary Lou Retton and Jerry West.”

Moss’ inclusion on that hallowed list allows him the opportunity to appear in person at the unveiling ceremony Friday to uphold the unofficial USPS motto:

“Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds… unless Kerry Collins is the postmaster or I’m feeling kinda down that day or if the letters are over the middle of the field.”