Plaxico Shoots Self In Leg; This Is Not A Metaphor

Plaxico Burress, who was listed as doubtful on the injury report for Sunday’s game, is probably not going to suit up now. He done shot hisself in the leg.

Plaxico Burress

FOX SPORTS’ Jay Glazer, who’s quickly challenging John Clayton as the go-to guy for breaking NFL news, reports this morning that Burress accidentally shot himself in the leg Friday night. He spent the night in the hospital with non-life-threatening injuries, and no details have been forthcoming from the Giants while they try to get to the bottom of this.

Clayton, trying to out-Clayton Glazer, adds the unsurprising fact that this took place at a club. Normally I’d go on a rant about bringing a gun to a club, but at least it beats bringing a gun to a Toys Я Us.

So many questions here. Was Plax trying to make sure he couldn’t play? Did someone tell him that shooting a tight hamstring could loosen it up? Did he get into a gunfight with a midget, who ducked between his legs just when Plax took the shot? Will my fantasy team let me put him on IR?

Domenik Hixon will start for the G-Men tomorrow against the Redskins. He is battling his own ankle injury, but he’s the preferable choice because it’s not a gunshot wound.

More on this as it develops, obviously.