Philadelphia sports fans, in general, are jerks. And not in the good, New York kind of way. Booing Santa Claus is the most popular case of Philly fanaticism gone horribly awry, and today, THE SMOKING GUN offers the latest example.
A Philadelphia man tried to extort money from Giants head coach Tom Coughlin “by claiming that he would expose details of extramarital affairs purportedly engaged in by the head of the reigning Super Bowl champions..” Classy.
According to federal investigators, Herbert Simpson recently sent Coughlin a pair of letters that were supposedly written by two women seeking the payoff in exchange for their silence about the affairs, which supposedly occurred while the Giants visited Philadelphia last December for a game against the Eagles.
Ingenious. But it gets better: the two women recognized the handwriting in the extortion letters as that of Simpson, a former co-worker, who was apparently too stupid to use a computer.
When the feds confronted Simpson, he cracked, and said the letters were a “bid for ‘revenge’ against the two women in connection with ‘work-related issues.’” Translation: the girls repeatedly gave Simpson “the Heisman“, and this was his grand plan at retribution. I’m shocked he wasn’t able to pull it off.
Although Simpson claimed in the letter to make Coughlin’s life “a living hell by doing something to [his] family,” he later told the FBI he was just joking. Hilarious. Predictably, Simpson was charged with a felony count of mailing threatening communications, and, in a just world, will end up serving two years in the clink.
If Simpson wanted us to believe him, he would’ve mailed the letter to Bill Belichick. Duh.