Pacman Jones To CBS: I Just Like Strip Clubs Man

Usually, if you’ve been accused of putting a hit out on a man who then ends up paralyzed after being shot multiple times in the abdomen by one of your homeboys, you stay away from the type of establishments where the incident happened. If the throwdown came after a rough soul food dinner, you stay away from Southern. If this was a Sopranos style hit, you’re probably not eating Italian any time soon. And for the sake of all that’s holy, if the whole scenario unraveled after a crazy night in a strip club, you really want to stay away from the nudie bars for awhile.

Pacman Jones Don Imus
(Another year, another on-air controversy for Pacman. Remember Imus?)

Well, if you’ve come to those rational conclusions yourself, you’re not Adam “Pacman” Jones. The former top-10 draft pick turned face of the NFL’s prison image not only kept going to strip clubs after his arrest outside a Las Vegas joint, he kept going to them at rashly inappropriate times … like the night before a meeting with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, where he was going to present himself as a “strip-club free” changed man.

Now that Pacman has been dropped from yet another team, more details are coming out about just how his hit in Las Vegas was authorized, and just how often he visits nighttime entertainment usually frequented by ladies of the night. In his first interview since being released by the Cowboys — with CBS NFL host James Brown as leaked to THE SPORTING BLOG — Jones explained why he’s still willing to risk rather dire consequences to hang out in strip clubs: He just likes them.

Well, we should have all seen that coming.

In fairness, Jones says he hasn’t been in a strip club since “the incident”, which is a blatant lie. Everyone knows it is, because his attendance at SCORES in Manhattan the night before his meeting with Goodell was well publicized.

So what was Pacman thinking? Clearly, he hopes that some other team is dumb enough to pick him up, which would be a tremendously bad idea based on his performance, let alone his indiscretions. But the best line from the video has to be his initial, gut response to Brown’s completely appropriate initial question. Here’s the direct dialogue:

James Brown: “Why do you still keep going to strip clubs?”

Pacman Jones: “Well, strip clubs are just like regular clubs.”

Whuh? No, strip clubs are not like regular clubs. They just aren’t. First of all, naked women are involved. Secondly, the ones with clothes aren’t wearing many. And, perhaps most significantly, there’s constant temptation to touch some women … without the ability to legally do so. Strip clubs are the club world’s version of giving a depressed teenager a gun, a case of bullets and then telling him not to use either of them. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what’s probably going to happen.

That’s the full video below, for your perusal and digestion, not that it takes much. This is Pacman Jones, after all. If ever there was a monolithic, pantomime villain in American sports, he’d have to be it.