NYU Has Special Student Sendoff For Mets Fans

A skosh of old news is never old if you just heard it for the first time. We’ve gotten behind on our back issues of the WASHINGTON SQUARE NEWS, but they report that New York University’s commencement ceremony this summer will be at Yankee Stadium.

NYU graduates

Y’know, not all NYU students are Yankees fans. Many are Mets fans, and some are even Red Sox fans. (We’re still looking for the Royals fans.)

I can’t speak for the sentiments of the mixed NYU students, so I’ll just blockquote them and rebut them behind their backs:

“If that happens to me, I will cry,” said CAS junior and lifelong Sox fan Rachel Chapman. “Graduation is such a community thing, and when you put it in a sports stadium, you’re including another community.”

Wouldn’t she cry at graduation anyway? Because, you know, that’s what girls do.

“I would rather graduate somewhere that’s more neutral, because I’ve always kind of thought of graduation as a momentous, happy occasion, and I wouldn’t really want to associate it with the Yankees,” said CAS junior and Mets fan Francesca Basile.

Neutral? You mean like Camden Yards?

“NYU is supposed to be a university that is ‘in and of the city,’ not a university that is in and of Washington Square Park,” said CAS junior Alex Hogan, a Mets fan. “I hate the Yanks, but Yankee Stadium is a landmark and Shea isn’t.”

Not an actual Mets fan, but a student planted by Hank Steinbrenner. The first creative ploy he’s done so far as operating head of Yankees.

“I’m totally freaking out!” said lifelong Yankees fan Ally Sacks, a Tisch senior. “I was like ‘they couldn’t have picked a better place.’”

“Totally?” Check. “I was like?” Check. “Omigod?” Ch… wait, where’s the “omigod?”