Nude Streakers Are Sex Offenders In Colorado?!

You may vaguely remember a female streaker at Coors Field for a Rockies-Red Sox game earlier this season:

Coors Field Rockies Female Streaker

(If she only knew how close she was to being a sex offender!)

It’s probably not a coincidence that she didn’t take her top of during her drunken display. Because if she did, she might’ve been forced to register as a sex offender.

The BOULDER (CO) DAILY CAMERA reports that 12 streakers in Boulder aren’t so lucky. Over 100 locals took part in something called the “Naked Pumpkin Run” on Halloween, and for the first time in 10 years, local police arrested a dozen of the nude runners and charged them with indecent exposure.

Uh-oh.

Indecent exposure is a Class 1 misdemeanor in Colorado, and if the runners are convicted of the originally charged offense, they will be forced to register as sex offenders.

Convicting a naked pumpkin runner of indecent exposure in court, however, may not be completely straightforward. According to state law, the prosecution must show that the defendant “knowingly exposed his genitals to the view of any person,” which is the easy part in this case, and that the exposure likely caused “affront or alarm” to someone.

Proving someone was caused “affront or alarm” is hard part when it comes to the runners in question. But thankfully, not too hard.

“How does a jury figure out if someone is guilty (of affronting and alarming) beyond a reasonable doubt?” Alexander Garlin, a local lawyer said. “I would guess the average Boulderite is not likely to be affronted or alarmed — entertained, maybe.”

If the runners are able to plea bargain the charge to a lesser offense, they would like face a “public indecency” misdemeanor, which ironically involves what seems to be worse offenses against the public: masturbation, sex in public, etc. But a guilty plea or conviction in the case would not warrant sex offender status.

The harsh nature of the law really is a shame for Denver sports fans, as a nude streaker would be the highest form of entertainment these days at Coors and Invesco Fields.

And don’t think I was going to post a piece about a streakers without posting this: