I do tend to do more international stories on weekends, but it’s still weird that this is not only my second soccer post in two hours, but my second Liverpool post in two hours. But trust me: this tale of modern athlete love is a good one.

(You’d rather I run a photo of the soccer player?)

Jermaine Pennant is a winger for Liverpool, perhaps best known for wearing an electronic ankle bracelet during a game while he was on probation for drunk driving. Now he should best be known for MySpace stalking a topless model, breaking up with her after she saw CCTV footage of him cheating on her, then proposing to her at her newly-dead brother’s grave. WTF. (More pics, of course, after the jump.)

Pennant was a 23-year-old with Birmingham City when he noticed Amii Grove, in the sense that 23-year-olds notice blonde women with large breasts who pose for Page 3. So he did what any young lover would: he sent her a MySpace message.

Naturally she found this the most romantic thing ever, and soon moved into his mansion. But once Grove saw security camera footage from his mansion of Pennant cheating on her, she went back to her career of whipping her knickers off.

But when Grove’s brother died this summer in an ATV accident, Pennant saw his chance. When she was at her most vulnerable, he made his move:

She told the Sunday Mercury: “We went to visit Lee’s grave and I was kneeling down laying some flowers when Jermaine bent down next to me and asked, ‘Do you want to get married to me?’.

“I told him straight away that I did and asked, ‘So are we engaged?’ - and he said ‘yes’!”

Pennant will now be looping the CCTV footage from his mansion like Keanu Reeves did in Speed.