Today’s the final day to get your MLB All-Star ballots in. There are a few close races left (especially between Ryan Braun and Kosuke Fukudome in the NL outfield), but we come to you today with a choice that promises to tear our nation asunder. As MLB.COM points out, Alex Rodriguez has slipped just barely ahead of Derek Jeter in the race for the most votes between the two.
Sure, both players are safely ahead of the competition to start on the left side of the infield for the American League, but that’s not the point. Which man does America love more? Is it A-Rod, kabbalah extractor, Madonna knower, and home run derby skipper? Is it Jeter, who can’t help it if he loves too much in too many positions? (Unfortunately, none of them are shortstop, but still.)
Don’t you understand? If you don’t go to MLB.COM now and vote for one more than the other, you lose the right to complain about either of them for the remainder of the season. You have to choose one based on their clippings! Do it now!
What? You vote on the All-Star team based on merit on the field? Tsk. We’re so disappointed in you.
(Actually, go vote for both of them the allotted 25 times today just to make sure both make it to the game. We look forward to the yearly eyeroll from Jeter to Rodriguez when Jeter can’t get over to make a play. Also, we hear that This Time It Counts™ and won’t it be nice if at least some Yankees can play in a game that matters to the postseason?)