The Pulitzer Prize winners were announced this week and Gene Orza, the former chief lawyer and current second-in-command at the MLB Player’s Association, could not wait to send his congratulations to them. Well, one of them. That he’s never met. Orza sent a fanboy letter to an arts criticism writer like kids write to baseball players.

Better yet: Mark Feeney, the aforementioned winner for his work in the BOSTON GLOBE, talked about the reason why he received the e-mail thanks:

“…apparently [Orza] is a Nixon freak.

Fourteen years ago, I was a finalist for a thing I did on Richard Nixon, and I later wrote a book [Nixon at the Movies] about Nixon. In this email, he says “Oh, you got robbed 14 years ago, and I love your book, and I’m so glad you won now.””

The man charged with negotiating the 1985, 1990, 1994 and 2002 Collective Bargaining Agreements and will sit down with Bud Selig in 2011 to work out a new agreement has a Nixon fetish. It all becomes clear now.

Enemies list? Hell yes. Start with Selig and the owners (especially the one that made him look like a steroid lover), add in Henry Waxman, and work your way down to the bottom of the list where the girl at the Chipotle across from the office keeps putting sour cream in his burrito when she knows he’s lactose-intolerant.

Paranoia? Wouldn’t you be? Shouldn’t you be? After all, Gene Orza knows you’re reading this right now. The whole post has been bugged.

And any of that group of baseball execs (union and owners) can be tracked down just by following the money.