Miss. State Brings Body Paint, Fellatio To Rivalry

On Tuesday, we brought you the story of Tennessee’s shirtless “Wild Boyz,” which sounds like the name of an “alternative” adult movie - and which looks like one, too. But despite the overwhelming shirtlessness of it all, it was still a bit, well, passive. It’s not an orgy if everyone’s just standing around; you need some action.

Mississippi State Shirtless Suck It
(But what if I don’t want to suck it?)

Fortunately, as you can see above, Mississippi State is upping the ante in the SEC. Sure, most people would balk at encouraging your rival to perform oral sex on you, especially since said rival has won 7 of the last 9 games and just got done ending your season with a 45-0 ass-kicking, but you know what? Mississippi State’s just going for it, man.

Yes, our more wrestling-savvy readers will recognize the toweled exhortation as an unsubtle reference to the “Degeneration-X” wrestling team from the early part of this decade in the WWE. You know, these guys:

Oh man, so “in your face.” That Hunter Hearst Helmsley sure is something.

But when you consider the limitless amount of trash to be talked between in-state rivalries, on-field results be damned, doesn’t it seem like there’s a better way to go about it?

Like, okay. The Bulldog in question has chosen drawing on a towel, then drawing on himself, encouraging random people to put their mouth on his “Bulldog,” referencing a stale old pro wrestling gimmick, and beasting in front of a camera. Okay, friend. Instead of all five of those things, let’s choose “none of them.” Yes, “none of them” is a much, much better idea.

Now let’s get a shirt on you and get you out of here. You’ve obviously had a long day and/or concussed yourself.

7 comments

  1. GravatarLSUTIgah
    1:19 pm on August 6th, 2009

    Doesn’t matter anyway. Until recently USM has been the best team in that state for a while anyway. Ole Miss MAY be able to beat them this year.

  2. GravatarFamStyle
    2:14 pm on August 6th, 2009

    Ole Miss beat USM 27-7 you dipsh*t.

  3. GravatarOM
    2:33 pm on August 6th, 2009

    That’s funn LSUTigah, considering the ass kicking that we put on y’all last year.

  4. GravatarWhiskeyWednesday
    3:03 pm on August 6th, 2009

    LSU almost lost to Troy last year, dickass. Hey, it’s cool though, you probably didn’t even go to LSU, so feel free to hop off that bandwagon and start rooting for Texas or some sh*t.

  5. Gravatarssmund
    3:05 pm on August 6th, 2009

    Ole Miss doesn’t even play USM, dipsh*ts. And, I’m just guessing here. So, feel free to correct me if I’m wrong. But, I’m willing to bet LSUTigah is either a Southern student who bandwagons with LSU or just some random asshole in south Mississippi who bandwagons with LSU.

  6. GravatarJ
    4:11 pm on August 6th, 2009

    It’s funny…the last time Mississippi State was relevant in football (or in anything sport whatsoever) was when DX was a big deal. Being a State fan these days is about as lame as showering with your granddad.

  7. Gravatarstate sux.
    10:54 am on August 12th, 2009

    Lol, it is state after all, what do you expect from them.
    Most of their players are nothing but thugs anyway.
    i’m just wondering how much this will rile up the OM players, not that they needed any help.
    This stupid act by said thuggies will prolly come back and bite them in the ass come gameday.

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