• Our own Pete Gaines reminisces about the time he & his buddies ended up cavorting at a Chicago strip club with Michael Irvin.
• The Red Wings have released Chris Chelios, but that doesn’t mean the 47-year-old is ready to hang up his skates just yet.
• Sean Avery supposedly gets his own serving of sloppy seconds in the form of Mark Sanchez’s supermodel girlfriend Hilary Rhoda.
• Egypt’s soccer team denies being robbed by hookers, blames the media for distracting them to defeat.
• Brock Lesnar thanks God, not steroids, that he’s “built like a black man”, yet doesn’t care too much for President Obama.
• Just in time for Wimbledon - tennis babe Maria Kirilenko in a bikini. Not to be outdone, fellow Russian racket-eer Tatiana Golovin also slides into a swimsuit.
• Fun at the ol’ minor league ballparks this week: Native American Christian midget rappers, Hillary Clinton bobbleheads, and spam carving.
• Kill a pedestrian, that’ll be 30 days in jail. Steal Lance Armstrong’s bike, that’s goona be 3 years.
• Allen Iverson, Jim Mora & Joe Namath come together to get autotuned. It’s got a good beat and it’s easy to dance to!
• AC Milan owner & Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi certainly loves the ladies - no matter what the cost.
