Nothing says summer quite like taking a leisurely stroll to the neighborhood ballpark, watching 9 innings of baseball in the cool night air, having a hot dog, maybe a beer or two, and finishing off the day by heading back home, having a nightcap, and biting your neighbor’s ear off.
According to the STANDARD-EXAMINER, neighbors Kevin Olsen and Donnie Gaskins had returned from the Ogden Raptors game (a Dodgers minor league affiliate) when Olsen offended his friend with some kind of comment, perhaps an insult about his mother. At this point Gaskins retaliated the only way he knew how:
Gaskins responded by striking Olsen in the face several times and then clamped down on his ear with his teeth and pulled back with enough force to rip off a part of the ear, said Ogden Police Lt. Scott Sangberg.
He wasn’t sure which of Olsen’s ears was damaged.
While that would seem like a good sign for the victim that officer couldn’t tell which ear was damaged (maybe it’s not that bad?), it probably means his other ear wasn’t in the best shape either.
But the larger question remains: Just what makes a man bite another man’s ear off? Was it the disappointing game, a 10-4 loss by the Raptors? Was it the scorching 92-degree weather? Was it the built-in frustration of following any minor league team, knowing that as soon as you get attached to a certain player he’ll be promoted to the next level and out of your life forever?
According to ABC SCIENCE, it doesn’t have to be any of the above. Sometimes, people just feel kinda bitey:
Human bites make up between 2% and 23% of all bite wounds, with 15% to 20% of them being to the head and neck. Common sites for human bites include the hands, arms and shoulders in men, and the breasts, genitalia, legs and arms in women.
Most of these bites result from fighting, but sports accidents and sexual activity are other sources of injury. And biting is seasonal - in the United States at least – increasing during the spring and summer and on weekends.
So keep an eye out, boys and girls. If you see someone licking their lips hungrily while staring intently at your warm, soft, juicy flesh, get out of there immediately. We’re in the peak of Biting Season, people!
No word yet on when the Ogden Raptors plan on having their Bobble-Ear night.