Sure, there are plenty of things I like about Little League: For example, it keeps kids off of my lawn. Also it promotes exercise … unless the player in question is in the outfield. But when the final week of August rolls around, I expect to see children in football pads and cleats, or at least in the gym watching girls volleyball.
Take the lad above, for instance. Luke Ramirez is 6-foot-2, 200 pounds, and plays for the Parkview (Chula Vista, CA) Little League All-Stars. He should be hunting quarterbacks right now in some Pop Warner youth program, but instead he’s still terrorizing kids half his size on the baseball diamond — his team is 2-0 in the Little League World Series at Williamsport, PA. ESPN loves the this time of year, of course. But below are 10 reasons to not like it so much … only one of which involves gigantic kids who might kill you with a foul ball.
10. Giant, Shrek-like 12-year-olds. (See above). Parkview rampaged through the regionals outscoring opponents 98-15, with 38 home runs. After watching one of their games on television, it’s easy to see why: Not only is Ramirez already man-sized, but several of his teammates are almost there as well. Time for a height and weight limit, Little League baseball?
9. Grownups fighting for foul balls. Um, this is a Little League game, gentlemen. Cripes. Oh, and nice effort there, Mr. Cubs fan.
8. Going crazy with the rosin bag. Also unwise — giving kids access to eye black. It all only leads to mess and regret.
7. Crying in baseball. Hey, here’s an idea: Let’s take a genuine, heartfelt moment and exploit it by broadcasting it to millions, and adding commercials!
6. Flat-brimmed caps. Roll that brim, son. You could eat dinner off of that thing.
5. Canada. Their fields didn’t thaw until two weeks ago, and their bat racks contain mostly brooms, umbrellas and hockey sticks. Yet they show up every year and we let them in.
4. Adult base coaches. Would be OK I guess, if they understood the basic concept of the high-five. FAIL.
3. Spontaneous Bloomberg appearance. If this doesn’t spell bad luck, nothing does. Sorry Staten Island All-Stars, but you’re doomed.
2. Dubious fundamentals. Another graduate of the Gary Sheffield School of Moving the Runners Along. Sad, really.
1. Come on, Bloomberg! At least honor your phony-baloney photo shoot by actually watching the game.
7:07 pm on August 24th, 2009
Got GH?
7:18 pm on August 24th, 2009
What happened to # 2 and #1????
7:50 pm on August 24th, 2009
Whoever took the time to come up with this is a jackass.
12:05 am on August 25th, 2009
So, you want to punish the kids who grow too soon? Yeah, like that’s fair. When do you decide to punish them, exactly when they reach a certain height/weight or only if the rest of their team is good enough to make it to the LLWS? Also, if you’d noticed, the CA team had 7 home runs hit by 6 different kids in their first LLWS game. Some of those kids were pretty small. Should they be banned too, because they can hit the ball too far?
About the only thing I agree with is that flat visors on hats look stupid, but hey, it’s not my hat, so clearly I have no say about it.
I think the smeary eye black looks dumb, but some of those kids are wearing the taped on eye black, so do you want to complain about that, too?
It’s sometimes hot and really humid in Williamsport, so how do you decide that it’s too much rosin for a spectator who sees a kid use the rosin bag a couple of times a game? Was it because your hand was all nice and dry, while you sat on your couch, that made it annoying to watch the kids with sweaty hands use rosin?
No crying? Uh, some of these kids are 11. I’ve seen major leaguers, Olympic athletes, etc., cry…sorry you don’t have any emotions.
Michael Bloomberg may have been on his phone (for 2 minutes, 5 minutes, or 10 minutes? talking to his kids or spouse or a friend? telling someone how the game was going?), but he was still looking at the field.
The adults in the stands weren’t fighting for the ball, just standing and reaching for it, like people do at every single field where foul balls are hit. Should they stay in their seats and just let the ball hit someone in the head?
Yeah, the Canadian team, who actually gave Chinese Taipei a run for their money for most of the game…should’ve just stayed home, because they play hockey. Whatever.
Where’s your complaint about the German & Saudi Arabian teams who are made up mostly of Americans? The Germans being military and the Saudi Arabians being gas contractors. I figured that would be one of your useless whines versus a kid using too much rosin or having messy eye black.
Dubious fundamentals? First, you complain because there are big kids that are too good, then you want to complain that there are kids who aren’t good enough? Oh, and in case you didn’t know, when you get a bunt sign, you’re not necessarily supposed to wait for a strike, unless no one is on and you’re bunting for a base hit.
I came across this blog by accident, when looking up who the “Beasley” guy was from the scroll on ESPN, and I generally like sports gossip blogs, but this one…not so much.
How about you sit back and watch the LLWS and just enjoy watching the talented kids, no matter what their size, no matter what country they’re from, no matter how much rosin/eye black they use, and know that they’re having one of the greatest times of their lives. I was on a softball team that won a national championship in 1978 when I was 14, so I kind of know what these kids feel like. They’re having fun with their teammates, their parents are having a great time in the stands, and it feels pretty darned great to win the biggest tournament possible for your age group/league. It’s something those kids will never forget, even if when they’re 45 and haven’t touched a glove or bat in 20 years. I admit, about five years ago, I did throw a ball once at a AAA baseball game in the booth with the speed gun. I think it was 70mph, which wasn’t too bad for a 40 year old woman that didn’t have any warm-up, although I was sore for at least a week afterward.
As you might have noticed, I’ve watched just about every single LLWS baseball game that’s been on so far and have enjoyed them all. Perhaps you either need a kid that’s really good in sports or to have been a good athlete and be lamenting the good old days when your body wasn’t failing you, to enjoy every minute of these games. Especially now that the horrid Harold Reynolds is now gone and we don’t have to hear all of the kids’ names mangled and have him repeat every little fact that he knows about the game at least 20 times each game. Except for the Olympics, the LLWS is my favorite sports event to watch on tv.
I love a good rant, but I’d rather you ranted about stupid things like dumb looking hats and awful child actors doing “special interest stories” when they know nothing about baseball, so they keep repeating what the kids say back to them, instead of being able to ask follow-up questions.
Okay, I’m now done.
12:18 am on August 25th, 2009
#11: Coaches NOT IN UNIFORM.
If Zim can do it, anybody can.
2:15 am on August 25th, 2009
“Oh, and in case you didn’t know, when you get a bunt sign, you’re not necessarily supposed to wait for a strike, unless no one is on and you’re bunting for a base hit.”
That’s where I stopped reading because you are an idiot. You bunt strikes, if you’re only supposed to swing at strikes, why wouldn’t you only bunt at strikes? The other team will know you are sacrificing, you wait for a good pitch to bunt, and if they don’t give it to you, then you get on first base with a walk and didn’t even have to get out. Woohoo, congratulations for not knowing anything!
8:23 am on August 25th, 2009
90% of the kids playing little league baseball aren’t eligible to play in this tourney. If you’re from a small town you have no opportunity to even qualify so all the best players aren’t even in the tourney. And ESPN ruined this sport just like everything else they touch. Remember when they only televised the championship game on Saturday late afternoon. Now they have the regionals on as well as the entire tourney from Williamsport and I have not watched one single inning.
8:51 am on August 25th, 2009
Someone needs to tell Flippy calm down a little and appreciate some humor. Looks like he still has not left his glory days of the 1978 championship. Oh and Flippy next time the ump makes a call you don’t like, stay in your seat & shut up, it’s only Little League.
To: Flippy
From: Floppies
9:33 am on August 25th, 2009
Yet another cheap shot on Canada from a low life American, stay classy my friend.
10:26 am on August 25th, 2009
Grew up with the little brother playing for 15 years. Enjoyed every bit of this; low blows and all. Don’t forget the mom’s with lawn chairs, visors and leather skin who could have been stunt doubles in There’s Something About Mary.
11:46 am on August 25th, 2009
Okay # 2 and # 1 are visable now.
1:50 pm on August 25th, 2009
Little League parameters were created a long time ago when kids were kid sized and they used wooden bats. My kids played LL and are quite good (they are in Juniors and Seniors now.) and I never wanted want my kids playing third base 55 feet or so from a 6′2″ kid using a composite bat. LL needs to be modernized, so the kids can learn to play ball instead of relying on over-sized pitchers and cheap, cheap home runs.
So:
1. No more composite bats. Aluminum is bad enough, but composites are ridiculous. Especially because a large portion of unethical coaches, players and parents have them rolled. The distance balls are traveling in relation to the quality of the swing and the contact is an effin’ joke. In a perfect world, it would be wood bats only.
2. Move the bases to 70 to 75 feet and the mound to at least 53 feet. 98 mph-equivalent fastballs are ridiculous, and you should be able to knock a ball down at short and throw a runner out before he is slowing down in right field.
3. Fences to 250.
4. If a kid is 12-13, over 5′8″ and 180, he should have to move up to Juniors and play with kids his own size, just like football. They could come up with a scale for “play-down” just like football, so tall, very skinny kids and short fat ones would still be eligible, as well as just about any 11 year old unless he was over 6′ and 200 lbs.
5. Over zealous and delusional parents and coaches are ruining the game. I don’t know what to do about that.
2:07 pm on August 25th, 2009
I want to add one more thing:
I am a middle-class suburban white guy and I think it would be awesome if someone besides suburban, middle to upper-middle-class white kids were able to play baseball in America. The expense, time and travel are becoming prohibitive. It would be nice if LL, Inc. put some of its (huge) amounts of cash into funding more than just a few token programs for inner-city and less fortunate kids, instead of building themselves a bunch of new offices. They make a fortune from ESPN, dues-payers and the equipment companies. It’s sad; baseball used to be the game that brought Americans of all backgrounds together, now it’s becoming the opposite.
6:36 pm on August 25th, 2009
i agree with some, and think a few others are a little soft.
as for flippy or something….if you want to complain, o.k. but your response was a little obsessive. well, over the top. your response was WAYYYY to aggressive and defensive AND insulting. you used the i word to much. almost as if you have some issues. mental? emotional?
please, flippy, if you would like to talk. feel free to do so. your self-rightous, narcissistic response is a display of anger, even hatred. i dont know if you were abused as a child. maybe you are still angry that you were not good enough at something as a kid and just cant let go of being rejected. but you do have issues.
please, flippy. write back so we all can help. maybe brooks will have a blog just on you. help flippy become the floppy she wants and needs to be.
and by the way, flippy, are you divorced? gay? spoiled and not able to deal with reality so you live in a fantasy world that consists of you being right all the time and everyone else is an “idiot’?…….
please flippy, let us help you. help us,,,,,to help you.
9:03 am on August 26th, 2009
@Flippy - 70 mph in a booth at a Triple A game as a 40 yr old woman? You might want to see if that speed gun was calibrated correctly because I don’t believe it.
@Wilee - you talk of cheap shots towards Canadians and then you dish one out yourself at Americans, not really “classy” as you say.
1:32 pm on August 26th, 2009
Who sh*t in Flippy’s wheaties this morning?