• Vols coach Lane Kiffin warns recruit: If you choose South Carolina over Tennessee, prepare for a career pumping gas.

• Beauty pageant competitors Christiann & Arielle Unger have an axe to grind with you.

• Could Franco Harris’ son become the next mayor of Pittsburgh?

• If you’re going to be sitting around watching March Madness anyway, why not use that time recovering from a vasectomy?

• If you want a high-five from Paul Pierce, better leave the LeBron jersey at home.

• Which is the more flagrant foul - a hit to the head, or a punch to the gut?

• “Harvard Beats Yale 29-29″: Baffling headline, but a good documentary.

• When it comes to courting lesbian fans, women’s college basketball programs seem to prefer the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy.

• It’s quite possible that the Golden State Warriors are the NBA’s biggest trainwreck. Clippers fans can breathe a slight sigh of relief.

• Good news for San Diego State pitcher Stephen Strasburg: One scout calls him the best prospect he’s even seen & could be repped by Scott Boras. The bad news: Stephen will likely be drafted by the Nationals.