Jose Canseco tells Steppin’ Out magazine, "They’ll be making a movie about my life very shortly. But we’re having difficulty finding an athlete who’s 6’4”, 250 [pounds] and [has] a 33-inch waist and a 54-inch back, and who’s tall, dark and handsome, can act and play baseball! So, I may have to play me."
What the hell is he talking about? I’ve got just the guy.