• WITH LEATHER finds Chelsea trading the pitch for porn stars, as the English soccer team parties with Jenna Jameson.

• BABES LOVE BASEBALL apply their Voodoo Sabermetrics to Nationals center fielder Lastings Milledge.

• Michael David Smith of AOL FANHOUSE wonders why the mainstream media is virtually ignoring Karl Malone’s possible statutory rape allegations.

• DEADSPIN wants to know if you approve of John Salley’s media work.

• YOU BEEN BLINDED goes house-hunting, as Pacman Jones’ Tennessee abode is up for sale.

• HUGGING HAROLD REYNOLDS gallops over their preview of this weekend’s Kentucky Derby.

• Tom Knott of the WASHINGTON TIMES blasphemes that LeBron James is no saintly savior.

• WAGGLE ROOM can’t understand why would anyone want to attack a golf course’s famous Lone Fir.